Don’t Try To Bend The Spoon Bend Your Mind
Here is a quick little BadBoy article that makes some good points. I agree with what he says about focusing on what makes you happy.. Remember you only live one life… make it special. Check out Badboy’s ebook
Change Yourself by Badboy
Pick up is ALL about mindset, more than anything else. Almost everything PUAs do is just an attempt to communicate that they have or artificially create the right mindset. But by doing this artificially you are still investing all your energy and focus into picking up girls which is the wrong thing to do and will create weak results.
Something I noticed throughout my life is that when I went out with the sole intention of picking up girls, often nothing happened. But when I just had fun with my friends, and didn’t care about girls at all, I would have the greatest success.
Why?
When you go out with the sole purpose of getting girls girls, your mind and body become Needy. Maybe not on the first layer of communication if you know what you are doing, but needy on a deeper more fundamental level that shows itself in subtle ways. Girls will pick up on this.
And we all know that any neediness turns them off.
When you focus on your OWN fun, on your own energy, you are happy, you don’t need them; you are just enjoying your life and as a result they will be all over you. They start approaching you. They realize that being in YOUR world will make them have a better night and possibly, over the long term, a better life. It’s just insane. That’s the benefit of having a good lifestyle.
While watching the Matrix last week, I had a flashback. When Neo comes to the Oracle, the little girl tells him, Don’t try to bend the spoon, bend your mind.
It’s a PERFECT analogy for pickup. I love it. It defines so many things.
In our world it would be: Don’t try to seduce her, seduce yourself!
Dont focus on her, focus on yourself.
If you are bored with yourself and your life, she is going to be bored with you as well. If you are sad, she is going to be sad. If you tell a very exciting story about something, she will pick up your energy and become excited as well.
Did you notice that when you tell a story that’s boring to you, she becomes bored? That’s why routines suck. When you get sick of saying the same thing over and over, they will pick up on it. I’s better to be spontaneous and real.
Everything you try to fake for her that actually bores you and isn’t creating real emotions for you will cause her to get sucked into your emotion\world and become bored as well. Th’s why, when you focus on making yourself happy, living a genuinely exciting life, they will be happy and excited around you as well.
So create a life that makes YOU happy. Not somebody else. Focus on yourself.
Sign up for interesting things, so that your life is genuinely intriguing to you and get out of bed in the morning in a good mood. If you spend all day at a computer (which btw, sucks your energy down), make sure you do physical, social things to compensate for it. You are not going to be able to go out and shift suddenly to super cool guy if you spend all your free time staring at a screen like a zombie, whether it be the TV or a monitor.
As a rule, please, add less computers, TV and internet and more social/active things to your life. Get out of the house, hang out with people, sign up for the things you’ve always thought about doing; classes, hobbies, events, etc…
Your life will change for the better and your results with girls will mirror that.
And remember, your life with girls is just a reflection of your life with yourself. It’s only part of the bigger picture.
BadBoy
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.