How To Lead… A Social Circle (With Power)
Here is another article from S. Nash. I really am enjoy reading his stuff and just discovered hm a few weeks ago. His ebook has gotten great reviews.
How to Be a Leader by Stephen Nash
The last of the 10 Essential Skills worth learning is becoming a leader.
Throughout these 10 lessons, leadership is a hidden quality that is
necessary to reach the higher levels of social success.
Leadership is first evident in how YOU choose to live. If you are
able to LEAD your own life (aka: autonomously), this will directly
translate into leadership skills with women, socially, at work,
etc. You must know that inner quality of knowing your own purpose
and direction, and focusing direct action towards that result.
Without an understanding of that, not even Tony Robbins can
help you…
Autonomy is a well-covered topic over here, and if you are reading
this and have no idea what I am talking about, be sure to peruse
my blog’s archive and read more. Or, just grab yourself a copy of
my “How To Get A Girlfriend” ebook.
What I want to talk about here though, is how to become a leader
socially – which is critical, since meeting women 99% of the time
happens thru your social circle. Being a leader socially
immediately puts you in a position of power.
Here’s how…
If you really want to expand your social circle (and therefore meet
new people… new *women*), you will have to take the lead and make it
happen. Your friends may or may not be interested in meeting new
people. Your friends may or may not be interested on growing out of
their small comfort zone. That is why it is so important for you to
be willing to go out alone – particularly if it is something you
really want to see, or experience.
One way to lead is to organize events and activities. I used to
have a loft in Brooklyn, and would throw monthly parties as a way
to expand my social circle. After every party, I would have new
numbers of women that I eventually dated or invited to the next
party. Had I not taken the lead, and gone through the effort of
making the event happen, I would have never met these women.
Also, I made countless new friends in the process. Another fringe
benefit to throwing parties is that when you are out meeting new
people in other environments, you have an automatic way of keeping
in touch with them – “Hey, I am throwing a party next month, give me your
email address and I’ll send you an invite”. All of these new
people show up to your party, and now you are on your home turf,
meeting new people. Everyone wants to meet you because it is your
party!
I understand that you may not have the space to throw a party, but
most people are able to throw dinner parties, right? Here is an
idea – throw a dinner party, and ask each friend to bring someone
completely new who will not know the other people there. I used to
do this a lot, and it always makes for an exciting evening.
Develop a theme around the dinner. I remember one dinner party I
threw was based on a Mediterranean theme, and another was an
evening with different ‘stews’ from around the world. Use your
imagination and have fun with it. Again, this is a great way to
meet new people. Feel free to confide in your female friends that
they are more than welcome to bring their single friends along
Lastly, if you are totally out of ideas, throw a party in another
person’s space. Ask your friends, who happen to have the killer
house in the center of town, if they would mind if you threw a
dinner party at their house. You will manage the invites, the
dcor, and the clean-up, while everyone invited will bring a dish
to the night. All they have to do is get dressed and have a good
time. If the party is going to be big, get some friends to help you
out. The basic rule of thumb is to have one person helping you for
every ten guests. So, if you can only find three other friends to
help you with the party, be sure to have no more than thirty people
attend this is supposed to be fun, right?
Ultimately, you can simply become the “go-to” guy for what’s
happening. I regularly get people together – from all corners of my
life – and head out to do something fun/new/interesting/cool here
in New York City. I simply send an email, and let everyone know
what “we’re” doing. I will typically get around 20% of people who
are available and interested. These friends very often ask if they
can bring someone, which I of course encourage. My girlfriend and I
often go out on the weekends with a group of around 10 friends in
tow. It is always more fun with others, and it is a great way to
meet new people.
If you use your imagination, and take the lead, there is no way you
can be stopped from expanding your social circle.
So, that’s 10 of 10 friends… I’m sure hope you got something positive
and helpful from this series. If you really want a final answer to
all of your dating and women woes, check out my Natural Attraction
audio program.
In it, you receive 7 disks and a workbook complete with EVERYTHING
you need to know from meeting more women, to flirting, storytelling,
escalating, teasing, endless dating advice (where to go, why, what
to do, what NOT to do), fashion advice etc. Also, each disk contains
exercises designed to quickly and effortlessly teach you the skill
in question. This is the only product you need to give you the
maximum edge in dating, and in life.
Also, feel free to shoot me a line with any questions, and if you
don’t mind it being broadcast to the world, type the world
“mailbag” in the subject line.
Talk soon,
Stephen
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.