The Becca Mistake

I’m writing this more for me than for you.

Once upon a time someone said that if you make a really big mistake with a girl you should name it after her and then make sure that you don’t repeat it.

In my life I have made roughly a Kajillion mistakes with women (Technical term).

However there are only 3 so far that I have named after girls.

1. The Christeanna mistake refers to when I had the most ridiculously hot girl ever interested and in my apt at 3 AM and couldn’t make a move cause I was too into her. I fixed this with Meggan in Dallas by making sure that even when I’m super ridiculously stupidly into a girl, I keep things sexual at the same time.

2. The Jamie mistake refers to a habit I used to have of getting WAY too drunk around women I liked, which then leads me to doing stupid things like telling this girl I thought i was falling for her on our 2nd date (with the help of a half bottle of vodka). Also haven’t made this mistake in like 5 years either…

3. The Kristen mistake was last year when I was in love with Kristen but kept holding on to the idea that we weren’t exclusive because “I don’t do exclusive”. This led to me never committing to her despite the fact that I wasn’t sleeping with other girls or even really interested in other girls while I was with her.

Eventually this killed the relationship and even more unfortunately our friendship…

Now I’ve realized another sticking point I have that needs to be named and eliminated.

I’m going to call this the “Becca” mistake. Becca is the girl with really good game that I have been… I don’t even know what to call it anymore.

But the mistake/sticking point I do understand.

I need to be more efficient with language and stop texting back and forth with girls all day. In fact as of yesterday I have established a new rule for myself for texting. I will no longer text any 1 particular girl for more than 5 exchanges a day.

Everything that needs to be done through text from flirting to setting up a date can be done in 5 back and forth.

The issue here is that I REALLY like smart funny girls. A girl who can make me laugh thru text is worth her weight in gold to me. But this leads to situations like Friday where I texted back and forth with Becks all day and then she blew me off to hang out with another guy she is seeing.

But not before sending me a picture of the outfit she was going to wear out with him…

As Captain Jack said when I spoke told him about it Sunday ” That’s the behavior of a girl trying to get murdered.”

Really though the whole situation is my fault as I got caught up in the whirlwind of texting and the fact that we did actually sleep together and missed/ignored a lot of signs. I was overly arrogant about the fact that if a girl interacts with me long enough we will almost certainly sleep together.

As I often say on a long enough timeline the chances any particular girl who is around me won’t sleep with me drop to 0. But I didn’t look at the fact that I was getting played, and that I was more invested than her. Which never works.

The other part of this sticking point, is that due to the overly verbose nature of my life, I tend to talk too much in both real life conversations and text. Which leads to 45 minute convos with girl with an amazing vibe but without the needed qualification/investment/commitment necessary to prevent flakes once the memory of the amazingly attractive vibe fades away.

So I need to make an active effort to actually “game” and not just get caught up in the fact that girls like talking to me and I like talking to them.

It would also help if I could start being more concise but the long rambling nature of this blog post makes me feel silly about writing I need to be more efficient with language here.

I think I’ve clarified this enough for myself now.