Understanding Risk vs Reward in Dating
I got this email this morning? and it brings up a topic I?ve been wanting to discuss for awhile..
First, here?s the email?
subject: you guys are always right
Even though you and Rob said don’t send a woman flowers…well I did. Things were going awesome with?this totally hot, beautiful blonde. She was totally into me, sending selfies, and phone calls. She made a couple comments about flowers, so I sent her some. Now, Totally gone cold. It’s like I have the plague or something. Crap! Why didn’t I listen to you guys? Is there any hope of pulling this out of the fire now? What should be my next move? – Thanks
Now, I know some guys will want the answer to his question of how turn things around? but what I?m going to discuss in this newsletter will help make sure you never find yourself in that position to begin with.
I want to talk about something a lot of guys don?t understand when it comes to what I teach?
Probability is the measure of the likeliness that an event will occur.
And its a super important concept to understand if you want success in any area of your life.
So getting back to the email I received above.
The reason Rob and I stress NOT to send a girl flowers is because the probability it turns her off is much greater than the probability it turns her on.
Do some girls like getting flowers? sure. ?But 9/10 times confessing your feelings or sending her flowers, doesn?t work. And has a negative effect. ?Do you like those odds? I don?t.
Will there be times when a girl needs to hear how much you like her? Or where she is hoping to get flowers at work. Sure. 1/10 times. ?The problem is- as guys, we are HORRIBLE at determining which is girl is that 10%. For some reason, anytime we like a girl we convince ourselves that she?s the 10%.
We think every girl is the exception. ?But remember, 9 out 10 girls are the rule, NOT the exception.
And here is the pathway for success with girls, money, whatever?
That means play the probability.
Don?t worry about the 10%. Because you have NO CLUE which girls falls into that small percentage.
Worry about the 90%.
Also keep in mind risk/reward.
I?m not a math guy?
Reward = she enjoys it.
Risk = It scares her away
So essentially, you?re taking 1 in 10 chance that she?ll ?enjoy? it?
And a 9 in 10 chance she?ll find it ?scary?.
The reward is not worth the risk.
Ok here?s another probability and risk/reward example.
Should I go for the kiss on the first date?
9 out 10 girls expect you to kiss her.
1 out 10 girls might find it too aggressive.
Reward = you get to kiss her and avoid looking like a pussy
Risk = she turns her cheek and says ?its too soon?
Now, considering that the odds are in your favor she expects you to go for the kiss. The reward is pretty nice. And the risk is minimal. Why would you not go for it?
Its the same way with everything I teach.
Its all about probability and risk vs reward.
And this is the basis for nearly all seven mindsets I talk about in the Player?s Paradigm.
One of the concepts I teach in the program is this idea ?finding winning formulas?
The Key Lock Sequence is a winning formula.
The Scrambler is a winning formula.
Are they going to work on every single girl. No. But do they stack the deck MASSIVELY in your favor? Yes.
Guys who are good with women, control risk by understanding the most probable outcomes.
They make it look easy.
Because they go ?with the tide? instead of against it.
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.