Text Game for the PUA (day 18)

The long weekend is over and we’re back to our 31 Days to Better Game series.? In the last lesson we discussed phone game strategies.? As we all know, in today’s time, text game is just as important as phone game for instigating a date or keeping in touch after one.

Lance, from Honey and Lance, gives us a great lesson on how use texting to your advantage.? If you unfamiliar with Lance, read some of his insightful and entertaining field reports over at his site.

>>>Watch Video: ??3 Texts to Turn Her On and Get Her Out

day 18

Text Game for the Pua by Lance

Text game is an integral part of my arsenal. Before I get started, I want to say a few words about writing style. Good spelling and punctuation, use it! Don’t use cutesy textspeak (ur instead of your, etc), use punctuation, and supplement your lines with smileys and other emoticons. Why the big deal about grammar and spelling? Because if you’re using good English, you’re coming from a position of high value and it shows you have a command of language. Obviously, language is part and parcel of what pickup is all about. This also sets you apart from the legions of dorks who can’t spell worth a crap. I have a few exceptions here. I use a few acronyms, such as OMG or WTF. WTF is a good one, because you avoid the profanity but still express surprise or shock.

Also, consider this. I’m a bit older, around 30, and the girls I socialize with are high value woman in their mid or late 20’s who are educated. Using textspeak on a 28 year woman with an MBA would totally de-attract her. To get the high value woman, keep your language as tight as possible.

Okay, I use texting for the following reasons:

1. Flirting.
2. Maintaining a connection.
3. Escalation.
4. Quick scheduling or announcements when I’m on the go.

Since item 4 is fairly self-explanatory, I’ll focus on 1 – 3.

Here’s how it breaks down:

Flirting

When used in the right ways, flirting via text is very effective. Texting has similar properties to flirting over email (or sending messages using facebook or myspace), but the quality that sets it apart is immediacy. Everyone has a cell phone, and pretty much everyone has it on their person at all times. If you send a text, the other person is going to read it within a few seconds. Conversely, if you send an email, it’s possible that person won’t read it until the evening or the next day if you’re sending it to a personal account (and you should…don’t send flirty emails to a work or business account).

Not only that, but getting a text is like a little treat that breaks up the monotony of your day. Everyone loves to receive text messages! I haven’t delved into this, but I think some people derive a certain degree of social clout from the number of texts they get. If you’re a chick and you’re getting dozens more texts than the next girl, then you’re more popular…at least that seems to be the psychology. If anyone wants to dive into point, I’d love to here some perspectives.

One way I flirt over text is to send messages that will compel her to write back. It’s like playing a little game. Here are a couple of examples:

“Hey, just ate lunch at this great Thai place, you would love it!”
“Guess what I’m doing right now?it’s f’ing awesome!”
“Just read your horoscope, it’s crazy.”

All of these messages are intended to come out of the blue and compel her to write back and ask what it is you’re talking about. The key is being playful, interesting, and fun. Once she responds, you should banter back and forth for a bit, ie basic flirting. This gets her thinking about you and this method can be used to maintain a connection or escalate, it just depends on the direction you want to go.

I’ll use texts as a direct compliment. I often do this after a first date, either in the same night or the next morning.

“You looked totally sexy in that dress.”
“Had a blast, conversation was great, you’re a great kisser WOW!”
“You’re the cutest Leo EVER rawr.”

This creates a strong statement of interest and let’s her know that you’re absolutely interested in going further. There’s nothing wrong with a compliment as long as you’ve established a strong masculine frame during the date. It’ll pump her up and get her thinking about how cool you are. I’ll use this to spur a longer text conversation and then mix in some “normal” text convo, such as asking how her day went. This dialogue establishes that you’re a a normal guy and not a player (haha) or merely a flirt.

Maintain A Connection

If I’ve number closed a chick and I know I can’t see her again until the next weekend, I’ll text her just a little bit during the week to remind her who I am. The key here is to flirt and be a bit mysterious so that she’s compelled to see you when you ask for a first meetup. I rarely do fluff talk in these instances because you’ll risk losing the attraction by seeming mundance. As with everything else you should calibrate.

>>>Watch Video: ??3 Texts to Turn Her On and Get Her Out

I like texting during the day when I know she’s at work. Let’s face it, Monday at the office sucks (if you’ve got an office job) and getting flirty texts can be a real pick-me-up. I’ll mix this in with a couple of emails, some myspace stuff, and a phone call or two to maintain the connection until I see her again. Keep in mind that pickups are tenuous affairs and flakes can happen at any time…texting helps to cement a future meetup.