How To Use Social Value to Seal the Deal
Another great article by Derek Vitalio below. If you’re don’t have model looks or the big
bucks you need to learn how to build you social value. Derek gives you a guideline.
Using Social Value to Win Over Girl by Derek Vitalio
Has this ever happened to you?
You attempt to get a girls phone number and shes evasive about it.
Or if she gives it to you, when you do call her she doesnt pickup the phone.
And if you do get in touch with her, shes too busy to meet up with you.
Unless you have enough social value to a girl, youll most likely receive this kind of evasive treatment from her.
In previous reports Ive discussed how you can build your social value to women in a number of ways through
social proof from other girls
screening and accepting her
and telling fun, interesting stories.
If possible, you want to use all of these value-building elements in each seduction.
For example, lets say you enter a club and see the hottest girl in the room, the Object of Your Desire (OYD).
You engage other groups of girls in front of your OYD, collecting social-proof points. With social value now, you open the OYDs own group of friends and gain more social value by telling them stories and showing them cool demonstrations like reading their palms. You then screen the OYD hard, and if she passes, you accept her.
However, building social value for oneself is only half of the equation.
For while you want to BUILD your own social value, you can simultaneously work to LOWER hers.
While your social value moves up, her social value can also move down.
In mathematics, this is called an inverse relationship, in which when one variable increases, the other rises.
The easiest and simplest way to lower a womans value is to simply IGNORE her.
Ignoring a woman has a deep psychological impact on her.
Its a universal human trait to hate being ignored ? especially by others with perceived authority and social value.
Children who are routinely ignored by their parents often grow up to see the world as a cold place and desperately seek acceptance from others as adults.
As teenagers, being ignored by ones peers is akin to a social death.
And even moving to a new city where everyone treats you and ignores you like a stranger, living single and with few friends, can quickly grow emotionally exhausting.
Its a basic emotional need for people as human beings to be accepted and paid attention to by over people they hold valuable.
Ever been in the opposite situation where everyones attention is on YOU and theyre intently listening to what YOU have to say?
Like perhaps you gave a speech to a crowd and got applause. Or perhaps you had a large role in a school play. Or perhaps you had a particularly good time with some girls where you were on a role telling stories and they all laughed, rapt with attention. Or perhaps you found yourself in a leadership position and everyone did exactly whatever you said – not because they had to, but because you emerged as the natural leader of the group.
Any one of those scenarios feels pretty good. You probably even got quite an adrenalin rush and high from the experience.
If youve had an experience like that, you know how powerful that high is. Now imagine its exact opposite ? being ignored. Being ignored is equally as powerful, except that it makes you feel like crap, like a loser.
When youre ignored by people you hold valuable, its as if your total sense of social value is sucked right out of your stomach. And without social value, you experience the feeling of "genetic death? that without value, no woman will mate with you to pass on your genes.
Thats why we all like positive attention.
Beautiful women look for positive attention more than anyone else. Beautiful women are attention junkies. Why else would they spend hours every day fixing their hair and getting dressed in uncomfortable clothes, high-heels, and makeup if they werent looking for some positive attention?
Beautiful women go to clubs to pump attention from men directly into their veins ? its like a drug fix that they can never satiate.
Dont Give Beautiful Women Their Fix
Imagine a beautiful woman who is NEVER ignored by men. She ALWAYS gets attention from them. She doesnt even know what being ignored feels like. She has a lot of social value and on an unconscious level, she knows it.
Now imagine you open her group of friends and build social value for yourself by talking to all of them through stories, jokes, routines, and so on.
But you ignore HER.
You ignore the Object of Your Desire.
You even talk to her friends with your back turned slightly AWAY from her.
This is something shes never experienced before from a man.
You are different from other men.
Shell start to feel, Why isnt this guy paying attention to me?
As she stands there, ignored by you and her friends, and no longer the center of attention, her social value deflates like a popped balloon.
Pretty soon, shell start to feel terribly uncomfortable that her social value has been body slammed to the floor through the simple phenomenon of ? being ignored.
And shell get VERY antsy to win your attention VERY quickly.
Why?
Because, if she wins your attention, your social value will rub off back on her.
As youll see when you try this, within minutes most beautiful women will mentally snap from being ignored and try to win your attention back to them and away from their friends.
For example, if youre reading her friends palms but ignoring her, she might say, Hey what about me! or Do me next! or Let me try!
Do not immediately give in to her request. If you immediately give in to her request, shell have gotten her attention fix from you. Her social value will be restored. Shes won you over ? youre just another guy who will jump at her every little request.
Instead, tell her teasingly, Hey greedy fingers youll have to wait…
Then tell her friends, Is she your friend? Boy does she have greedy fingers.
Then continue to ignore her and continue to engage her friends.
Her social value will continue to deflate while yours will continue to rise ? an inverse relationship of social value. Your original social values will reverse. If you came in as an 8, youre now a 10. She falls from a 10 to an 8.
After ignoring her for several more minutes, shell be looking for any opening to receive your attention and acceptance of her – in just the same was as how most guys who approach her are looking to receive her attention and acceptance of them!
How sweet it is when the tables are turned hehe.
This is when you turn to her and start the process of Screening and Acceptance.
Do the math: Her value is lower than yours now. Shes looking for your acceptance. Youll want to eventually give her your acceptance to move the seduction forward, but dont give it up right away. Screen her hard first.
If youve done your job, shell try to win your approval by passing any screening tests you give her.
Then when shes passed your screening ? and EARNED your approval, give it to her.
Her social value will be restored in that moment.
Give her all of your attention now.
Now with her social value restored, she wont simply cast you away ? since she had to work for your approval and attention. She knows she could lose it again at any moment if she doesnt live up to your standards.
Her social value will rise back up to meet yours. You will now be conversing as EQUALS. She will treat you and respect you as her full equal, and easily fall in love with you.
And as long as she feels that she had to WORK for and EARN your approval and attention, shell have dopamine hormones flooding her head ? the hormone responsible for love, desire, and wanting to chase a reward.
So lets replay how this interplay of social value works.
1. You enter the group
Your social value: 7
Her social value: 10
2. You entertain the group, and ignore her
Your social value: 10 (+3)
Her social value: 7 (-3)
3. You screen her, and finally accept her
Your social value: 10
Her social value: 10 (+3 earned through your acceptance)
Now you’re both 10s.
And 10s sleep with 10s.
Its very important that once shes won your approval, GIVE HER ATTENTION ? she showed good behavior and deserves it. Do NOT continue to ignore her. If you do, youre moving BACKWARDS and repeating psychological conditioning that has already been accomplished.
Obviously, you dont always need to ignore the Object of Your Desire to lower her value to get laid. For example, it may be completely unnecessary to ignore a girl who already has low social value ? a girl that isnt particularly attraction for instance. Ignoring a girl to knock down her social value ? when she already has low social value to begin with ? could crush her ego.
But when dealing with attractive women, ignoring her followed by screening and acceptance will greatly increase your success rate. And the more attractive the woman, the better ignoring her works!
As you can see, the seduction process can be broken down into concrete, universal, scientific steps that return consistent results again and again. After all, all human beings on the planet share more than 99% the same genes. We all share in the same fundamental behavioral responses to certain situations.
Just as you know with scientific certainly that when you mix fire and gunpowder youll get a hot explosion, by mixing the elements of my course The Blueprint, A Linear Model Of Seduction youll get an emotionally hot explosion in women.
So check out the The Blueprint, A Linear Model Of Seduction, based on the trial and error process of the scientific method – for clean, reliable, consistent results.
You’ll also get access to my restricted VIP Lounge – which has quickly become an extremely valuable learning resource in itself!
Now’s the time to seize the moment… and enjoy the lifestyle!
Your Friend,
Derek Vitalio
This free training course shows you how to finally break free of your “nice guy” habits ruining your sex life.
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.