Tucker Max’s Guide to Mid Level Game

While Tucker Max never claims to be a guru for how to score with women, the man always has some great advice to shell out. If you want to read a highly entertainting book, check out “I hope they serve beer in Hell,” You can find it on his website www.tuckermax.com.

This is an awesome question. Listen to me very carefully. I am going to answer this, and my answer will probably go against everything you’ve been taught or heard. I am going to impart a lesson on you that took me years to learn, and is probably the single greatest principle that I can pass on to another male (or female):

Tell the truth.

There is no greater freedom, there is no more potent weapon, there is nothing more conducive to mental health and stable relationships than being honest about who you are and what you want.

Let’s back up and evaluate the situation. You have a female that you are in a semi-relationship with, that you see/fuck on a semi-regular basis. You want the relationship to stay exactly where it is, but you are afraid she will start asking the “where is this going” question. First off, if she doesn’t ask, then you don’t really have an obligation to bring it up, b/c if she doesn’t ask then you can legitimately assume that she likes everything the way it is, just like you.

But let’s assume that she does one day ask you, “Sweetie, where do you see this relationship going?” At that point, you have two options:

1. Lie and tell her anything that you think you can to keep everything in the status quo.

2. Tell her the truth, that you like the relationship the way it is, that this is exactly the type of relationship that you want, and you do not want it to change.

Now let’s evaluate the consequences of each decision:

1. You lie and tell her what you think she wants to hear. She may not buy it, and then you are fucked and its over. But if you have gotten to this point, you can probably say something that will satisfy her–at the time. But the fact is, you have now deceived her in order to get laid, and let me tell you–from my VAST experience doing that–it NEVER turns out well.

I am not making a general moral argument against lying or trying to persuade you to adopt my values–far from it. This is only the voice of experience you are hearing, and it is telling you that while lying to get laid (or keep getting laid) may work temporarily, it never lasts and it never ends well. All lying does is delay the day you wil have to deal with that question, and in the intervening time it allows the woman to emotionally attach to you b/c she thinks your intentions are comparable to hers. Now it is a few months later, she thinks you two are dating because you have had to continually feed her escalating lies to keep her going, and you have a serious fucking problem on your hands. It isn’t worth it. You are throwing gas on a fire to keep it from spreading.

2. You tell the truth, and let her know how you want the relationship to be. She could get upset or realize that she wants more and break it off. That is a possibility. But if you are respectful (and a little smooth), you can do this in a way that not only solidifies the relationship the way you want it, but also makes her more into you in a less attached way.

I only learned this lesson about 3 years ago, and it opened up a whole new world to me. First off, I learned that there are many women who want basically the same thing I do, and that if I’m honest about it I get it much easier. Believe it or not, many women want to fuck almost as much as guys do. The only difference is that they are more selective with whom they fuck, and they generally want more of a defined relationship. They want to know where they stand.

When I started being honest, in a cool way–not a “I just wanna fuck” way–a whole new world opened up. Instead of having to seduce and spend money and feign commitment, I just told them what I wanted and the ones that were on the same page were immediately into me. I get so much more pussy for so much less work.

Furthermore, it really does free you up emotionally. I don’t care what anyone says, lying and concealment take a burden on the soul. When you release that shit, the burden goes with it. Over the last year I have had the two most meaningful romantic relationships of my life; one with a girl who unfortunately died when we were dating, and the one I was in with TheBunny. I have been able to have these because I finally realized what I want from a woman (see the thread about how to pick a mate), I told these girls about it, they had no problems, so we were able to go forward in a positive way. Had I met either of these girls 3 years ago, my mindset would have been “What do I have to say to fuck them,” instead of what it is now, and I wouldn’t have been able to connect with them emotionally because our relationship would start out as a lie and because we would have incompatible goals.

Telling the truth and being honest about your intentions is the final step of good mid-level game.

But the great man does not stop at mid-level game; he takes it a step farther. Advanced game in this situation is to pre-empt the question; to bring the subject up before she does. This is what I do now, and though the two things overlap somewhat, they are not the same.