The Best Way To Master Any Skill: Loving the Process
During my time learning about pick up, running small businesses and virtually any other skill set I have tried to master, I have always noticed there is essentially one thing that separates the average guy from the superstar. The ironic thing is it is very rarely raw natural talent or some god given gift that separates these two kinds of people. More often then not, it is a very simple characteristic that completely determines the success that a person will see in any goal they wish to pursue.
This simple attribute is focusing on the learning process more than the end goal.
By this I mean, truly enjoying every phase of progression. Focusing on the little things they have immediately in front of them instead of distracting themselves with the future. This sounds incredibly simple, right? If this is this deciding factor between winners and losers, how come everyone is not a winner? The simple truth is, learning to think like this is again a choice and not some natural gift some people have.
Countless times, I have gone out with guys that are trying to improve with women and they are borderline dreading it the second they walk in a venue. Usually, they muster up the courage to approach one girl, mess it up and then come back to me saying ?I suck, This is pointless, I quit.? The crazy thing is they just made serious growth, because before tonight they would have never even approached. However, because they are so focused on the end goal of banging super models this approach is seen as a massive failure and they lose all joy from working on the baby steps.
This is pretty unfortunate, because after this night of massive progress many guys quickly stop going out and working on improving with women. Why? Because they hate the learning process.
How are you suppose to master something when you hate taking the 1000 baby steps to get to where you want to go? By making their goals so big, they are overlooking the 100s of small wins along the way to their goal and gaining zero satisfaction from improving. This is a HUGE problem that separates many men from not just success with women, but success with life.
Now, there is always the rare guy who comes back from his first approach and say something along the lines of ?Wow, can you believe I just did that … Let?s do it again.?
These are the guys that get good because every night they are working on meeting women there are noticing all the small ways they are getting better and having a blast. This results in them naturally becoming the kings of any skill set they pursue, because they love pursuing the it just as much as reaching? it. Massive success is inevitable with this mindset.
The funny thing is, it is like this with almost every other area of life. If you only get satisfaction from a million dollar paycheck, you will never reach that goal because anything less will be a endless grind to you. You will never become a skate boarding legend if you first cannot enjoy doing your first kick flip. Learn to love the little things, and they will bring you to the big things.
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About Alex Becker Alex Becker is a dating coach and writer with a huge knowledge base in PUA, psychology, and social dynamics. He currently spends most of his time focusing on teaching college aged men how to naturally improve their success with women. In his free time he enjoys playing guitar, building websites, and his dog Chewbacca.