Learning During The Inevitable Cold Streaks

Excerpt from my book Bang:

Some productivity experts recommend you attach a deadline to your goal. For example: “I am going to sleep with a mother and daughter team within six months.” I don’t advise doing this because the game is so unpredictable and quirky that time goals can be discouraging during the inevitable cold streak. As you gain skill, there will be periods where you sleep with multiple girls in a short amount of time, followed by nothing for several months.

When I was a full-time student of the game, I went to great lengths to get out of a cold streak. I would pull out a piece of paper, write a short-term goal, and make a bullet list of all the things I should do and try to get out of it. The goal was usually set a month from when I started to write down this list. The sad part: I never achieved the goal within the deadline, and stopped making lists.

It took myself years later to realize what happened. During the goal month I experimented a lot with a shotgun strategy, trying to hit something that can get me out of the cold streak. I was learning instead of succeeding. Once the month was over and I was disappointed with the results, I put my list away and then unconsciously only did things that worked well. Then I banged something.

At least once a month I go out and spit the craziest and weirdest shit I can think of. I remember one time I got out a scrap piece of paper and pretended I was reading simple lines like “Hi. How are you. What is your name?” Then the girl would peek at the paper and see a stick-figure drawing of me and a cat. And she would give me this look like “Who are you?” I don’t do this to get laid but to learn how girls respond to things and where the limits are. Learning and success go hand in hand, but they don’t always happen at the same time.

Girls and monogamy-inclined men really hate the methodical approach to game where you set goals in the form of vaginas and write down notes or ideas to accomplish them. I’ll admit it is a little weird, and it’s not something I’d tell to people who aren’t doing what I’m doing, but it works.

For more page-length excerpts of Bang, click here.