A Primer on Asking Questions
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One of the biggest misunderstandings guys seem to have involving social skills is how and when to use questions.
Back in the day when I got involved in the whole Secret Underground Internet Seduction Community (SUISC) most of my teachers considered asking a woman a question in the first few minutes of an interaction equivalent to spitting herpes blood in her eye.
There were tactics and posts about turning questions into statements and of course the rise of routines etc…
But there never seemed to be a guide to how and when to use questions. Being that I am by far the most normal of the pickup instructors I set out to understand how I was able to ask questions and not get a bad response early on.
Turns out questions are not the worst thing in the world even during the beginning of a conversation, instead what really dooms guys when asking questions is the follow-up.
Most guys ask questions like this:
Guy: Where are you from?
Girl: San Diego
Guy: Cool, what do you do there?
Most guys (especially on bootcamps) follow up questions with a ratifier (agreeing that what the girl said is cool or acceptable) followed by asking another question. This is BORING, and doesn’t demonstrate anything interesting or attractive about you.
There’s nothing inherently boring about the question but the way it’s followed up, makes me want to stab the fictional guy in the jaw.
Instead you want to use questions early on to either tease, transition to a new conversational subject or to relate and play up a commonality between you and the girl.
Let’s look at each of these:
Teasing
Guy: Where are you from?
Girl: San Diego
Guy: Uh oh SD girls love to party, mental note do not date this girl.
Transitioning
Guy: Where are you from?
Girl: San Diego
Guy: Oh I love San Diego I usually go down there to do a little surfing. I’m a big surfer and SD is great because…
Relating
Guy: Where are you from?
Girl: San Diego
Guy: I went to college in San Diego did you ever go to Roberto’s best mexican food ever…
Now obviously there are unlimited ways to use questions when talking to a girl you’re attracted to, but this post should give you a good idea about how to use questions to keep a conversation moving forward.
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About john sinn Sinn is widely regarded as the second best PUA in the world. Sinn is known for his hard nosed style and take no excuses approach to teaching. He is a nondenominational teacher, which means that he subscribes to no particular method and instead blends the best of every school of seduction to create the best possible results for himself and his students. Sinn is currently running his own pick up company The Sinns Of Attraction, which offers live, phone and email training.
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