The Most Dangerous Game: Playing it Safe
When I am out with a group of sexually frustrated men, the most common thing guys tell me after they talked to a girl is that the girl didn?t like them or they didn?t click. Then comes the tirade about how they suck with girls and cannot get laid yada yada yada.
The sad part is it?s true. If they keep going about talking to girls the way they are probably going to die a born again virgin. It?s funny though, because if guys changed a few of aspects of how they talk to women they could very easily attract any girl.
The main problem most guys run into is they do not take risk at all when talking to a women. By risk I mean taking any sexual position whatsoever and being completely reliant on the girl to make the first move. Bad news though kiddies, hot girls do not make moves very often. On top of this you are the man, in the sexual realm the man leads (unless your into some weird stuff). There for, its time to take a risk and put yourself out there sexually. This may seems risky, but if you are actually trying to make connection with a girl its is your safest bet.
Think about it.
How are you supposed to have sex with a girl if you are coming off completely asexual and playing it safe by flirting like a old person back in the 50s. You cannot. This is why it makes absolutely no sense that when most guys approach girls at the bar they stand 10 feet away from the girl and ask her about where she?s from, what she likes to do, and where she goes to school. This is the same conversation you have with your sister, and unless you are also trying to bang your sister its time for you to change your game plan buddy.
Now, the reason most guy do not walk up girls and start making sexual moves is because they are afraid of rejection. To avoid rejection they play it safe when talking to girls and stick to boring conversations like I stated above. The girl then walks off because there is zero sexual chemistry and the guy wonders why no girl in the bar wants to talk to him.
Do you see how playing a low risk game is actually gives you the highest risk of failure?
Sex and relationships are about emotional chemistry, not logic. Taking risk and being sexual causes these emotions. Dating is not like the stock market, you can take as many risk as you want and the only penalty for a chance at glory is a moment is awkwardness.
Imagine if you went up to 10 girls, told them they are cute and hugged them. Then you started talking to them like they were already your girlfriend. Yes, you will probably get rejected by some of them. However, if you only have a 10% success rate, you just met a girl that is totally into being sexual with you. Now, you are going home with a girl you actually click with while Mr. Play it safe is in the corner thinking you have some magic game that he will never have.
The joke is on him though because you do not have any magic line or techniques. You are just a guy and you owned up to it. You came onto a girl like a man, and now she?s into you because she?s a girl and likes guys.
It?s that simple sometimes.
The greatest thing about this is if you approach girls with a purpose like this from now on, you will get better at it. You will slowly start to see your success rate go up and you become more calibrated to sexually talking to girls, and guess what? By taking risk and being sexual, you will start getting sexual results … go figure!
Do girls leave you confused as to whether or not they like you?
Let's face it. Girl's don't make it easy for you. She will often send mixed signals leaving you unable to tell if she is being friendly or flirty. If you read her signals wrong you risk rejection and embarrassment. Or worse, you blow it with a girl who wanted to kiss you.
Here is a simple and innocent move that will instantly tell you if you're in the friend zone, or if she's waiting for you to kiss her.
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About Alex Becker Alex Becker is a dating coach and writer with a huge knowledge base in PUA, psychology, and social dynamics. He currently spends most of his time focusing on teaching college aged men how to naturally improve their success with women. In his free time he enjoys playing guitar, building websites, and his dog Chewbacca.