Me and Chat Roulette, Chat Roulette and I

There?s another sign reading ?Boobs please.? There must truly be something about fresh boobs. I mean, porn is what made the internet truly take off. Porn is everywhere. Yet, along comes a site where you can chat with anyone around the world?

And there?s a penis?

I suppose I shouldn?t wax poetic about the magic and wonders of technology and thinking about how far we?ve come technologically speaking in the past one hundred years. I mean?

Another penis?

What is technology but another way to get boys and girls together? This is better than porn because there is interaction that you don?t even have to pay for. You may get boobs and a conversation?

A girl? I just saw a girl? And she?s gone?

Shirtless guy?

Lonely guy?

I suppose that all these folks feel a little less lonely in this world. A little human contact when the need to leave your house becomes smaller and smaller with each passing day. ?I?d like to teach the world to use the Chat Roulette web site, I?d like to buy the world a?

Penis?

I?ve never seen anyone scramble so quickly just to type ?hi.? It?s a kid and his family in Australia. I get the feeling that many a guy has already passed him up in the search and he just wants to know what this is all about. Yes, I?ll say hello to your mom. I wish I could see her face when you finally get?

A sign that reads, ?Smoking kills.? Hmmm. The means of self-expression amaze, confuse and confound me. I?ve seen a guy with sunglasses on his penis, or he had a really long and funny shaped nose. I?ve seen an animated talking dog image. I?ve seen a sign that says, ?Boobs for Haiti.? I?ve seen my own cam picture reflected back at me, for a moment thinking I had linked to myself in the ultimate meta conversation. I?ve seen a guy with a paper bag over his head and a flashlight looking ready to tell a ghost story. I?ve heard a blast from the 90s as a man channeled his inner Bud Light commercial – ?What?s uppppp?

Penis?

Wait, was that the Jonas Brothers? Nah. I can?t know what the Jonas Brothers look like?

Fuzzy girl. Looks like she is too tired to change the channel. From Boston. May be asleep. Heck, she could be a boy. ?You look old.? Ah, truth. Usually in the form of a quick click away as all the guys are looking to find even a glimpse of a girl and can tell right away that I don?t have the genes to qualify. It?s refreshing to read a sentence of truth, albeit a short one. She?s watching a movie as she chats?

?Dude, we just saw the Jonas Brothers.? Damn, I do know what the Jonas Brothers look like?

A few people from North Carolina. Surprised I?ve seen nineteen penises. I?m surprised they have yet to see one?

Two sleeping dogs?

Guy with hand down his pants framed by a Valentine?s heart. When the chat roulette hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that?s amore?

Lonely guy?

Lonely guy?

Lonely guy who is falling asleep. Desperately trying to stave off sleep for a little while longer. There has to be someone to help?

Two guys?

Guy with hand down pants?

Guy in a wife beater. Actually types. It looks like daytime where he is. He?s in Australia ? I think from my previous interactions down under it?s afternoon?

Naked girl playing with a penis. That?s going to make a lot of penises happy?

Guy with guns on his shirt. Lifts up his shirt to flash me as we both laugh. Another swig of beer as he pulls his girlfriend close?

A guy with a wife beater and a sock cap. Pauses just long enough to say ?Fuck you.? If there are folks looking for lust, why not a little loathing?

Girl staring blindly at screen?

An empty dorm room?

A group of guys from England studying for a test in the library. I stop to chat, but their drunken friends come along and once they see that I have on clothes and do not have breasts, I?m not long for?

Guy with Fantastic Four t-shirt?

Girls with sign saying, ?fist pump??

Guy playing with penis through his sweatpants. After seeing everything else, my first thought is ?Really, can?t get up the energy to take them off?? Maybe he?s a little?

Penis?

Two guys, a girl and a bong?

Guy in Ed Hardy hat?

Che Guevara on the wall?

Girl yells ?Wait!? She starts to laugh with her friends. Implores me to show my penis. Offers to show her boobs. I can?t help but think that she should be able to find plenty of?

Penis?

Guy having some gum?

Black screen, wait there?s typing. Wow, I?m accused of being a pedafile (sic). I laugh. It makes him (her?) type more furiously. Now I?m a perv and I?m going to be analy (sic) raped in prison. That?s my pep talk for the evening, ?Beware the dangers of the internet and chat roulette.? Oh, I have learned. I will change my?

Penis?

Guy eating toast. He offers to share some through the camera?

Girl with Puddle of Mud shirt with a guy in the background. Girl doesn?t move as she sits cross-legged, but guy in back does. Now he?s playing with her breasts, pulling down the shirt, yet still she doesn?t move. Now he?s moving her hands, posing her, I think she?s a

teapot. And the finale, he poses her flipping off the camera. Wait, can he do it, ohmygosh, he?s posing her with a double flip off. Now he adds his own. What a gold medal marionette performance. Strange, they haven?t hit next?

Older guy with glasses and mustache with a Christmas wreath in the background, who smiles as big as he can and flashes the peace sign?

Guy with a laugh track?

?Tits or treat? sign?

Chat roulette statistics as someone scrolls through a spreadsheet and I am added, not sure if correctly, not sure if I care?

An hour is gone. I need to get to sleep. Maybe there is a little time to wax poetic. To marvel at all of these people around the world, taking time to meet each other, to take time to talk, to find?

Penis.