10 Years After I Took Her Virginity

I posted this story on my Myspace blog awhile back… unfortanately my profile was deleted. I get a lot of emails from people asking me to repost this story on this site. So here it is. In its entirety. The true of what happened after running into a girl I dated and deflowered back in college.

10 Years after I took her Virginity by Bobby Rio

I get the random phone call. Jillian, a girl I dated for a little over a year, about a year before Beth (love of my life till she broke my heart in a million pieces) came around, wants to know if I want to meet up for drinks one night this weekend.

I ran into her about a week ago for the first time in years and gave her my number out of courtesy when she gave me hers.

She’s ten years older then she was when I dated her, and she was no prize then. So I had no intention of calling her. But I should have figured she would call me. I took her virginity for god sake.  And she took mine (although I dont let too many people know that.)

I say, What about tonight. I refuse to waste a Friday or Saturday on her. Plus she’ll expect less time from me on a week night.

I call Jake on the way home.  Jake seems to think Im going to fuck her. I smile because there is a part of me that kind of knows its true. As much as I hated this girl when I was dating her; she is old pussy. And everyone loves old pussy.

I get home and search my drawers for my least appealing outfit. If Im going to fuck this girl, Im going to do everything in my power to convince myself I wasn’t intending to.

As Im checking my email, she calls. Shes been at happy hour. Great, she’s drunk. She always was an annoying drunk. She wants me to meet her at her apartment. This means we will be taking one car. There goes the quick getaway. I hear my buddy Phil saying, “Always take two cars, that way if its a bomb, you tell her youre going to take a piss, and you take off.”

I park my car outside of her apartment. I sit in it for a second. I think back to waking up with a huge hangover, and I realize that the day didnt exactly start out with promise. So why should it end with promise.

She answers the door dressed in a tight white shirt, a skirt, and totally inappropriate black hooker boots. An outfit I dont usually mind on girls who can pull it off. Shes 25lbs away from pulling it off. I sneer. She must have caught it, because she tells me she’ll be right back, and she comes back two minutes later in a different outfit.

It is awkward in her apartment. There is this little dog that keeps jumping on my leg, and I have to pet it while she tells me how cute it is. I keep nodding my head.

…”This is going to be a long night,” I think.

At that precise minute she puts the dog into her purse and tells me she is taking it with us for drinks. She tells me the puppy is too scared to stay home alone. I tell her, “that is a problem, isnt it?” She says we’ll go to a place outside. I tell her, “This is New Jersey there are no outside cafes.” She insists and I dont feel like arguing.

She soon realizes that New Jersey, does in fact, have no outdoor places.

I have now been in the car with her for twenty minutes. I wish I could tape record this car ride to play to people to demonstrate the torture I was going through listening to this bitch. Talking loudly and compulsively about nothing. Nothing I care about anyway. Finally I say, “just pick a place and leave the fucking dog in the car.”

She picks the Town Pub, which was good, because I dont know many people that go there. We get to the pub and this bitch won’t leave the thing in the car. This idiot puts this little puppy in her purse. I smile because, well, because shes’ crazy.

Amazingly the dog is being good. Apparently her rambling has put it to sleep. Unfortunately I don’t have that option. So I do the next best thing and guzzle gin and tonics. She is in the middle of some story about how she got pulled over for no good reason, and a guy playing pool over hears her. He’s a cop and is interested in her story. I take this as my cue to excuse myself for a much needed piss break.

I get out of the bathroom and this bitch has a crowd of derelicts surrounding her. All egging this stupid cop story on.

Instead of joining the fun I walked over to the pool table where three girls were about to start playing. I recognized one of the girls. She was an old college friend of a friend type girl. Over the summer she was getting harassed by a bouncer who was claiming her ID was fake. I was behind her in line and she told him to verify her name with me. When the guy asked me, I just for the life of me couldn’t remember her name. And so she was kicked out of the club.

I felt this was a perfect time to apologize for my blunder. Plus one her friends had made eye contact with me while I was grabbing a drink at the bar on the way back from the bathroom. Luckily her name came back to me right then. “Lauren,” I say to get her attention.

She’s a friendly girl and within minutes Im the fourth player on a two on two pool game. I figure Jill won’t mind, she is preoccupied with the derelicts anyway. I paired with Ivana. The cute one who was eying me. She has an accent. Shes from Denmark or France or something. We are hitting it off nicely. We are all kind of making fun of my obnoxious friend and her and her obnoxious stories. I explain my ordeal. They feel my pain. I need another drink. I offer to buy the girls a round. Something I never do, but Im feeling sporty.

I should have never left cause when I come back Jill is by the pool table telling the girls how we were each others firsts. I feel queasy. As Jill is talking to the girls, I twirl my finger by my ear to signify she’s crazy. The girls all laugh. I call Ivana over to me, and proceed to defend myself for ever having dated this idiot. I walk her away from the crowd. We chat for a few. We exchange numbers.

When we walk back to pool table there is tension between Jill and Lauren. Jill stops in the middle of a sentence to point out that Lauren has been giving her dirty looks. Jill comes over to me and explains how Lauren just hates her for fucking her ex boyfriend. And a bunch of other shit I could care less about. I just wanted to talk to Ivana some more. I tell Jill to go to the bathroom and cool down for a minute.

When she leaves the puppy wakes up. And apparently is scared of pubs. It starts freaking out. All the girls hover around the dog. I explain what a dog was doing in her purse. They decide that Jill is unfit to raise this dog, and decide to take it. I give a, ‘I didnt see nothing look’. One of the girls grabs the dog and heads for the door. I walk back over to Ivana and see if there is any chance of getting her back to my house later.

Jill has made her way back to the booth near the pool table. She glances at the bag and realizes that there is no dog in there. She panics. She looks under the table. She starts scurrying around. The two remaining girls decide its a good time to flee. Ivana and I say a nice goodbye. I promise to call. Meanwhile Jill has lost it completely. She realizes that the girls are gone now too. She is crying hysterically. She is screaming that the girls stole her dog. Everyone in the place is staring at her like shes crazy. Only she is crazy. I tell her, I will go outside to see if the girls have it.

Im standing by Lauren’s SUV. The three girls are in it with the puppy. I tell them they should probably give it back. Just then Jill comes barreling out the front door. Her face is covered in blood. She is absolutely hysterical. She runs over to the SUV and starts screaming at the girls. A bouncer calls me over and asks me what happened. He wants to know if they really have her dog. I shrug, feeling a little guilty for letting it happen. We look over at the car where Jill has pulled Lauren out. They are both punching each other violently. I ask the bouncer if hes going to break it up. “Not till a titty pops out.” He says. Finally the bouncer runs over and breaks it up. He then searches the truck for the dog. He takes it from the truck and hands it to Jill. Jill is crying and bleeding and hugging the dog. I suggest we leave.

We are outside Jill’s apartment and Im trying to calm her down. Her lip is still bleeding pretty badly. I ask her how it happened. She was bleeding when she came out of the pub, before the fight. She doesnt remember. Maybe she ran into a wall in all the confusion. I kind of pat her on the back, give her a little hug, and tell her, Its been a fun night, but I have to go. She says its really fucked up for me to just leave her like this. I tell her I have work early. I give her another little hug. She gets blood on me. I push her off and start to walk away. She says she cant believe Im leaving. I can. I got to get as far away from this psychopath as possible.

My head hits the pillow and I wonder if this is really what my life has come to. That night I dream of Beth and being up in Killington with her. Her all bundled up. Looking so cute as she keeps falling into the snow. I teach her how to ski and she picks it up quickly and soon she is beating me down the mountain. Later in the night we make love in the outdoor hot tub with a couple watching, waiting for us to use up the half hour we were allowed to be in there. When our half hour was up we just keep making love until someone from the front desk has to come in and tell us to leave.

Im awakened from my dream the next morning with a phone call from Jill. Shes in the emergency room and just wants to tell me what a complete and utter selfish, heartless dick I am. I agree. I really can be a dick. And so begins another fine morning.