Get into Her Genes
Here’s an interesting post from the guys at Pickup Arts…
Make her remember you by Jay Valens
Today I want to cover “fashion” in a sense LOL…
It is the goal of almost every red blooded man on this planet to
get into the jeans of the sexiest women he can. But what few of
them realize is that you have to actually first get into their
GENES! What do I mean by this? I mean that you have to understand
some facts that science has uncovered that will help you with your
quest. Evolutionary psychology and genetics have uncovered many
facts which are essential to understanding women.
Luckily for you, I have read more than my fair share of books on
the subject, so in this and future newsletters under this title, I
am going to give you just a few snippets of the knowledge I have
gained.
Today we will be discussing how women generally chose mates based
on economic resources or their *potential* to gain resources in the
future, and how this preference varies by country around the world.
Most of what we will discuss today comes from the excellent book
“The Evolution of Desire” by David M. Buss, which I highly
recommend that you read. All of the quoted passages in this
newsletter come from this book.
It is fairly common knowledge that women tend to prefer “rich” guys
over poor “guys”, good looking guys over not so good looking guys.
This problem is one of the reasons that we created “The Art of the
Pickup” DVDs, because we wanted to help guys who don’t have either
of these things. But we don’t deny the general truth of these
facts, instead we try to understand why they are facts so that we
can get around them.
The book “The Evolution of Desire” cites a study of 10, 047 women
from countries around the world: “Overall, women value financial
resources about 100 percent more than men do, or roughly twice as
much. There are some cultural variations. Women from Nigeria,
Zambia, India, Indonesia, Iran, Japan, Taiwan, Colombia, and
Venezuela value good financial prospects a bit more than women from
South Africa (Zulus), and the Netherlands, and Finland. In Japan,
for example, women value good financial prospects roughly 150% more
than men do, whereas women from the Netherlands deem financial
prospects only 36% more important than their male counterparts do,
or less than women from any other country.”
Since we have readers from around the world, it’s helpful to
realize that if you live in a country where women don’t need to
rely on men so much, you might have an easier time of attracting
women if you don’t have much money. Countries like the
Netherlands, Finland, Sweden have great welfare and social programs
and so women don’t care so much about money. If you are in a
country like Japan or Hong Kong then, using this bit of fact you
could consider moving to the Netherlands!
But moving takes a lot of effort and money, which if you had enough
of you wouldn’t need to move in the first place, so what might be a
better solution?
The good news is that women often can’t know for sure just by
looking externally what your financial resources are. (For
example, a woman looking at Warren Buffett driving his own average
car with no chauffeur would never know he was the second richest
man in the world.) So they try to judge this through the way you
act, the way you carry yourself, etc.
“But women needed cues to signal a man’s possession of those
resources. These cues might be indirect, such as personality
characteristics that signaled a man’s upward mobility. They might
be physical, such a as man’s athletic ability or health. They
might include reputational information, such as the esteem in which
a man was held by his peers.”
These things are more directly in your control. You can adapt
personality characteristics that are attractive to women, such as
confidence and dominance and persistence. You can exercise and eat
well to keep in good health. You can improve your reputation and
learn how to stand out in groups of people through how you speak
and carry yourself.
The news gets even better when you consider the following:
“A long history of evolution by selection has fashioned the way in
which women look at men as success objects. But the possession of
resources is not enough. Women also need men who possess traits
that are likely to lead to the sustained acquisition of resources
over time.”
What this means really is that if you have the show the kind of
traits that women are looking for, you could actually be better off
than a man who is rich already but doesn’t display these traits.
If this is hard to understand, here is an example:
Let’s say you are a struggling writer who has no money and is in
debt, but you show intense drive and passion and belief in your own
future success, you can still be much more attractive to a woman
than a guy who was born into money but is burning through it
quickly and has no passion or drive or evident ability to make more
money in the future.
“And women who value the personality characteristics likely to lead
to status and sustained resource acquisition are far better off
than women who ignore these vital characterological cues.”
What this says is that women who learned to look not just at the
appearance of resources, but rather the traits necessary to get
resources, were better off evolutionally speaking. That means that
most women alive today value these traits themselves more than the
mere appearance of having money and resources.
In summary, women do indeed look for men with resources and judge
that roughly twice as important as men do when looking for a mate.
But this varies greatly around the world, and since resources can
be faked or hidden, women evolved to look for personality and
behavior signs that a man has resources, or will be able to get
them in the future.
So the takeaway is that you have a few choices, you can either move
to the Netherlands, or get really rich, or instead you can learn
how to show the traits women are looking for in your actions and
conversation and behavior. Some of these were covered above, like
keeping healthy, showing passion and drive, dominance, etc.
Jay
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About Jay Valens Jay Valens & Ray Devans are the masterminds behind The Art of the Pickup plus the founders of the first & largest site dedicated to pickup, attraction & dating advice for men... Their [pickup newsletter] is top-notch & their advice caters to average guys worldwide, not just the young college or club crowd. They regularly answer subscriber questions & have one of the most amazing pickup learning tools around, The Art of the Pickup: Tactics & Techniques.