How to be Leader of Women rather Than Letting Them Lead You
Derek Vitalio is back with another good article. Women love leaders. I will say it again, Women love leaders. Women do not respect men who let them be the leader. That being said, read Derek’s article. I agree 100% with him. I love when women test me because it gives me an opportunity to differentiate myself from the other guys.
How to Lead Women by Derek Vitalio
Every woman will test their man for a certain trait. And that trait is dominance, the ability to be a leader. Particularly when youre setting the rules of the relationship, your woman will test you fiercely.
Shell test if your words are more than just empty stands, but that you mean them with action and discipline.
Shell test if she can get away with her bad behavior if she pleas and pouts.
Shell test if youre a strong man who wont just kiss her ass and always look for her permission.
A test is her challenge to you because she wants to feel your strength, your manhood, and your dominance. And generally, the more beautiful and feminine a woman you have, the more numerous and difficult her tests will be.
For instance, if your woman chronically arrives late to meet with you or doesnt arrive at all, and you let her treat you that way with a lack of respect, shell quickly realize that she can do whatever she wants with you and get away with it.
Or if your woman is asking all the time for outlandish favors and gifts, shes testing to find out if youre ready to do anything for her at her beck and command.
If your woman gives you orders in a direct or impolite way, she finds out if youre the kind of man who will let her treat you badly and to the extent that she can direct you.
If she speaks in a meandering way for hours about something that could be dealt with in a few minutes, shes testing to find out if youre man enough to interrupt her and tell her what to do.
If she uses dramatic emotions in her speech, mood changes, and sudden emotional wings, its to train you to get used to every whim of hers.
The basic meaning of all of these tests is, if you dont stand up for yourself, or if you dont take control and lead the situation, you are not a dominant man.
Tests are all about your male dominance.
And if you cant lead a woman in real life, how are you going to be man enough to ruthlessly lead her through explicit fantasies during Blissnosis?
Now, this testing is not a conscious process of hers. If its happened to you before, your womans not being malicious.
Its just her unconscious way to determine if shes with a real, sexual, dominant man – or a wimp.
And she wouldnt even bother testing you unless she saw at least some value in you. After all, if the woman wasnt serious about having a sexual relationship with you, she wouldnt even bother testing you in the first place.
So you HAVE to see tests for what they are “ opportunities.
EVERY woman youre ever in a relationship with is going to test you, at least on occasion.
A test is a golden opportunity to set the tone and frame of the relationship and establish your alpha masculinity in the eyes of your woman.
After all, shes HOPING that youll pass. Shes HOPING that you dont put up with her antics and establish yourself as the kind of dominant man that women want, including her. Shes HOPING that youre not like all the other average guys out there who immediately bend to being whipped.
So you want to LOOK FORWARD to tests.
But if dont react quickly to the lack of respect and handle the test correctly, you kill her sexual desire toward you.
For example, if she blames you for something that you didnt do and you try to defend yourself, youre already buying into her frame, the frame that she can pick on you for something trivial out of her imagination.
If she tests you and you try to smooth things over by giving her a backrub, or talking about feelings, now youre rewarding her. For example, if shes moody and impolite, dont make her hot chocolate to calm her down. Rewarding a woman in the face of a test makes her lose respect for you as a man.
Neither do you want to become upset or angry in the face of a test. Part of the purpose of a test is to determine if you give too much importance to what she says and let her antics control your inner state. For example, if you call her out on her behavior and youre upset and angry, you come across as week, out of control, and placing too much importance on it. Or if your woman, say, doesnt return your call, getting upset that she didnt call you back only makes you look needy.
And even if you calmly point out to your woman her behavior, she may feel attacked and want to fight back, even if on one level she knows that her behavior is bad. Some women may even start to feel self-righteous about their bad behavior in the face of an accusation.
The answer is that no test deserves a serious answer. After all, as soon as you give a serious answer or response, whether its in getting upset, or saying dont be mad, or trying to make her feel better, youve surrendered your frame and youre buying into hers. As soon as you let your inner state get out of whack, youve already lost the match and failed the test.
The answer to tests is not to give the woman a serious answer. You must keep yourself, relaxed and playful, almost as if you were playing a game.
For example, if a woman tells you in an impolite manner to get her something to drink, you could tell her, Hey sure, Ill get you a drink and then pick her up and lift her off the ground, spin her around, tickle her, and/or play wrestle her to the ground. Instead of getting her the drink, physically dominate her. Being physically dominant lightens the mood and established whose boss. And then you can tell her to ask you again, and if she asks nicely this time with kisses youll get her a drink. In this way you dont accept her frame and assume the leadership in the situation.
You can also reframe and dominate the woman physically sexually.
For example, if your woman makes a wild accusation based on virtually no evidence like telling you, What is this number on your cell phone that you called? Is this another woman? Are you cheating on me? Dont take the test seriously, but tell her, Yeah, Im cheating on you with two girls in fact. Both girls with big asses like yours. Then squeeze her butt and put your hand down her pants and start fingering her and talking dirty.
Heres the basic formula for dealing with a test.
First, reject her frame where she assumes that youll give her a serious answer.
Second, playfully create your own frame where you assume leadership and dominate.
The key to passing tests is always the same: ignore the frame of the test, show her that it doesnt worry or bother you. Playfully reframe the test and physically dominate your woman. This instantly lets her know who is the alpha male and who is the prize.
So dont cave in or fall for her tests. If you do, your woman will lose respect for you and sexual attraction is killed. But once she realizes that her games and bull wont affect you, that youre a physically and sexually dominate male, that you assume a role of leadership, and that your happiness and inner state isnt dependent on her mood swings, shell finally feel inside of her, Thank God I have a REAL man!
And with time, youll come to enjoy tests as you come to see them as opportunities to build respect in your womans eyes. And with time, your woman will test you less and less as she comes to understand at a deep level your sexual dominance in the relationship.
Check out my new program, the Masculinity Enhancement Series to transform your inner self and core beliefs to better handle tests, and my Blissnosis Master Program for transforming yourself and your woman into a tiger in the bedroom.
Derek Vitalio
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.