Cliff’s List 4/10/2006

Here is the lastest Cliff’s list newsletter.

Ranko Magami (Shark):
Detoxification from being gay and insulting girls

O.K. so I’ve met a lot of guys from the community and some were
infected by gay stuff, or they were trying to insult the girls when
they see them, and wanted to get rid of it.

If someone feels that is not the way to go, here is the healing
outline.

1. Being a gay man

What are the advantages of being a gay man?
A girl will not reject you on your opener because she will not
consider you a threat, so then you can wait to go home with them
and then try to jump her.

Well if your opener sucks then change that. Don’t become gay or an
alien, etc…

If you see that you have to go under the radar then change your
approaches. Don’t treat only the symptoms, treat the cause.

2. Insulting girls
Making funny remarks on girls that you are normally talking with
should be managed once, just so you see it is possible and you
overcome that block.
But many guys get stuck on this and only insult the girls.
They think the girls like them.
But they don’t like them.
They are only amazed that you could expect that anything else would
come out of that, silly man.

The only way is to break your fears of women enough so that you are
able to talk, discuss, and have fun with them the same way you do
with your male friends.
Do you need a story to talk with your male buddy?
NO!
That is not because you spent time learning it at home.
It’s because you are not afraid.

So in order to clean your mind from being gay or having a ball
busting influence you must take control and admit to yourself that
excuses were blocking you in the first place. Then the healing
process can begin, and that is the only way to perfection. The
process is hard and painful.

JMS:
Reading wikipedia I found http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerence,
which is basically the anatomy of a crush.
Limerence is the name given in this article to a crush or in PUA
terms, one-itis. I believe that there are lessons for people on
both ends (people with a crush, and people seeking to
create/intensify crushes in others).
I’ll leave it to you to draw your own conclusions. I’ve picked out
a few phrases that I feel are particularly interesting, although I
strongly suggest reading the original article.
Interesting phrases:
There is an initial phase in which buoyancy, elation, and freedom
are felt, which is ironic for this appears to be the beginning of
an essentially *involuntary* process. (emphasis mine).
For limerence to fully develop, some form of uncertainty or doubt
or even some threat to reciprocation appears necessary. An
externally imposed obstacle may also serve, such as societal
restraints or parental disapproval. Too early a declaration of
limerence or too early evidence of reciprocation on the limerent
object’s part may prevent the development of the full limerent
reaction. Something must happen to break a totally positive
interaction.

While limerence has been called love, it is not love. (A lesson to
some of us?)
Limerence develops and is sustained when there is a certain balance
of hope and uncertainty.