Syle’s Online Dating Game Formula
Below is Style’s formula for online dating.
I’ve been promising to post this for months, so here you go:
When I first started learning PU, one thing I tried early on was the personals.
I attempted all kinds of NLP-loaded letters that friends told me were foolproof
and got basically no response. And, if I ever did get a response, I sent an HB
my picture, and then never heard from her again.
So I engineered the personals like I learned cold-approach game: one step at
a time, until I felt it was foolproof. I can now, four out of five times, email
a girl and take it all the way to the !close without a problem. Shout-outs here
go to Lovedrop, David D, Ross J, Zan, and a guy on Cliff’s List who I think is
named Gamemaster, all of whom contributed essential pieces.
STEP ONE: COMPOSING THE AD
It goes against all logic, but the best profile is one in which you are a TOTAL
ASSHOLE. The first line of my profile is: I’m a selfish prick. THEN I go on to
describe my looks and physique. FINALLY, I tell them that I don’t give a fuck
what anybody thinks. I do what I want when I want. (Most of this is from
Lovedrop, so I’m only paraphrasing in case he doesn’t want it posted.)
Everything in the profile is designed to make me seem like a choosy selfish
asshole seducer. My tagline, adapted from Zan, is: “Run away, little girl.”
Finally, for the coup de grace, is something adapted from Gamemaster. When
I describe what I’m looking for, I say, “If I had to write a newspaper
personal, it would read something like this…” Then I go on to describe, somewhat
facetiously, that I’m a well-hung sexually talented stud looking for a married
woman who wants to make her husband jealous in order to procure expensive gifts
from him.”
Again, you can figure out your own wording. If you’re really retarded and
need it spelled out, let me know and I’ll consider posting a link to my
profile.
For the picture, I don’t post an actual photo. I post a SKETCH someone has
done of me. If you don’t have a friend with art skills, just get a sketch of
yourself done by a street sketch artist or at a comic convention or something.
This way, girls looking for profiles with photos will come across your profile,
but at the same time, you’ll be able to hook them with your personality before
they can just disqualify you as not being their type.
Often, girls will write me just to ask, “Are you for real?” because my profile
is so outlandish.
STEP TWO: THE FIRST COMMUNICATION
Whether I write the girl or she writes me, my letter is always pretty much the
same. I keep it short. Two paragraphs. The intention is that I am the prize,
and she will have to work to get me.
1. I bust her balls on something in her profile. (“What’s with the hat? Is the
top of your head pointy or something?”)
2. I give her a hoop to jump through, so that she has to meet my standards. I
also usually give her a nickname. Example: “I’ll tell you what, imp. Email me
at [Insert your email address] and tell me three qualities you possess that
would make me want to get to know you better. I will, of course, send you a
non-illustrated pic — two if I like what you have to say.”
STEP THREE: EXCHANGE PICS
Okay. She’ll send you her reply. Usually, you can tell by the tone what she’s
after. More than half the time, there will be a hint of sexual suggestion in
there.
In your response, bust her balls a little, but tell her you’re impressed (as if
she’s winning you over). Now I put her on the points system. “You’ve earned
three points for your sense of humor and three for your adventurousness,” I
may say. “At 15, you win my phone number.”
Now, for the picture, this is key. I used to lose the girl when I sent some
dumb digicam photo of myself. Fortunately, about a year ago, someone took
a photo of me for a magazine, so i tell the girl I don’t have a digital camera,
but I scanned a photo from a magazine for her. This is great, because it’s
great social proof and also a little mysterious.
If you don’t have a photo that’s appeared in a magazine, a school newspaper,
a society page, whatever (they don’t have to know where it’s from), just make
one. All you need is a good photo, a magazine, a scanner, and Photoshop.
I’ve had friends make really funny ones, with good captions. Usually, they’ll
take a photo of themselves out, or with a celeb (non-posed), and make it look
like it’s from the party pages of In-Style or something.
STEP FOUR: TAKING IT OFFLINE
Once they respond to this, it’s time to take it offline. Write them back, bust
their balls, and then write something casual like the following: “I can be slow
when it comes to online correspondence because I get pretty busy, so what
do you say we continue this on the phone? My number is below. Or, if you’re
shy and would feel more comfortable if I called, just email me your info. ”
At this point, she’s already interested, so whatever way you choose to get the
phone number is not a big deal.
STEP FIVE: THE PHONE CALL
I only make one phone call. That’s all it takes. All she needs to do is to hear
your voice (to know that you’re for real and not some sort of psycho). Here’s
the phone structure I use:
1. Don’t say hello and introduce myself. Instead, refer to a private joke from
my emails (such as saying, “Hi, imp,” if that’s her nickname), so that she
automatically recognizes who it is.
2. Break the tension right away with a pre-prepared story. Chose from any of
your favorite ASF stories. Jlaix has tons of good ones if you don’t have any of
your own.
3. Tease her a little into talking about herself, but only for a few minutes.
(It helps her feel rapport to talk about herself a little.)
4. Make a plan. Use the David D tactic: “I’m busy Wednesday and Friday, but
Thursday is good. Let’s just meet for a quick drink. That way, if you’re a
complete nutbag, I can escape with my dignity.” (Calibrate here: only say to a
girl with a sesnse of humor. Make sure you have a kidding tone; usually she’ll
tease you back.)
5. The plan should ALWAYS be for an intimate bar, where you can sit down.
SteviePUA has what he calls his Tonguedown Bar, where he takes girls to
make out. I’m talking about this kind of place, although with Solid Personals
Game you will not be making out here.
STEP SIX: THE FIRST MEETING
1. You need to pre-plan two things: One is a second venue to take her to if
you like her. A venue change IS key. Two, I recommend bringing friends.
Pretend like you bumped into them there, if you want. It surprises her when
you’re with someone, and also socially proofs you.
2. Greet her, then sit down with your friends. The game at first is ALL body
language. When i sit with her at first, I’m VERY distant with my body
language. It’s all negative. I need to let her feel that she is slowly winning
me over, that I’m getting comfortable with her. Also, the girl will almost always
give you negative body language at first, and if you’re totally open to her
with your BL, it makes you seem needy and supplicative. Trust me on this. It’s a
key subtlety.
3. INSTANTLY go into a routine. I prefer the Cube. Say, “Hey, here’s a cool way
to get to know each other. My friend just taught me this. Let’s try it.”
Another option is to do the lying game with one of your friends.
4. When you do the Cube, you go into mini-isolation with her and shut out
your friends. They will soon leave and, as you’ve instructed them, go to venue
2. Now it’s just you and her. While doing the Cube, you’re keeping distant BL
but at the same time displaying your humor and great personality. As she
starts warming up to you with her BL, you may start giving her positive BL.
But keep fractionating with the good BL, as if you’re not sure.
5. After a drink or two, you’ll realize that she’s beginning to like you. She
was doubtful at first when you met, but now you’re really winning her over.
Happens every time. Don’t know why. You almot feel like you could kiss her,
but don’t. Instead…
6. Venue change. Tell her you made plans afterward, because you just
planned on a short meeting, but since you’re getting along so well, she may
as well tag along. Then go to a bar, a concert, wherever. You will both run
into your friends here. Hang around, joke around with them, and make sure
she’s included and having a good time. The time distortion of the venue
change and the fractionation of being social again is really powerful.
7. Now, isolate her again. Sit on a couch, do the evolution phase shift
routine, and make out. Don’t forget to do two-steps-forward/one-step-backward
when making out.
CLOSING THE DEAL
Usually, unless it’s just one hundred percent one, I like to wait for the
second meeting to !close. It’s just solid game and ensures I don’t get LMR. So,
usually, I’ll:
1. Take her back to her car, make out with her like crazy, and then tell her,
“I’m trying so hard to be good right now.” You want to leave her well-teased,
so that she masturbates thinking about you that night. (I always ask girls in
bed if they touched themselves and thought about what it would be like to be
together, and they always confess that they did.)
2. See her again two or three nights later. The most solid way to do this is to
have her come over before going out. To drink some wine, and start fooling
around. If it’s on with no LMR, just !close. If she’s hesitating, then go out
for a drink, and take her home afterward and !close.
Okay. I hope this isn’t too basic. But this IS the SOLID GAME formula for the
personals. As long as you have some semblance of a personality, humor,
grooming, likability, and style, this will make the personals such a turkey
shoot that you’ll probably stop using because they’re so boring. Seriously.
Report back with your results! Any feedback and criticisms are always
welcome! And please, if you’re a lurker with no social skills whatsoever, make
sure you market this information as an original e-book in order to discourage
the free-flow of good PU ideas and techniques on ASF…
Love,
Your Long-Lost Style
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About Bobby Rio I'm Bobby Rio, one of the founders of TSB. I tend to write about what is on my mind so you'll find a mix of self development, social dynamics and dating articles/experiences. For a collection of some of my favorite articles check them out.