Yahoo Groups March 10 2006 Mail Bag

Message: 1
Date: Thu, 9 Mar 2006 18:24:33 -0500
From: “J Eric Murphy”
Subject: Re: So I Finally Made Approaches

On 3/9/06, Chunwah Ho wrote:
>
>
> — J Eric Murphywrote:
>
> > Today a week into the drill and I stopped trying to
> > make excuses and
> > start making approaches. >snip< > > Eric
> >
>
> Congrats on making it through the first step. Realize
> that you’re doing something that the majority of men
> cannot do. Give yourself a pat on the back.
Thanks for the encouragement Chun!
Actually I am taking it from the 21 day drill, then the reporter drill
after than then some ancoring drills after that.
I have also owned the natural leader and expect good for quite some
time, the originals and the new versions.
This is bad that I have been lurking on this list since the begining
and am now just starting.
Eric

> P.S. for optimal results read the 21 day drill in the
> files section (created by Hypno Bill)
>
> Chun

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Message: 2
Date: Thu, 09 Mar 2006 23:38:59 -0000
From: “George”
Subject: Re: So I Finally Made Approaches

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “J Eric Murphy”
wrote:
>
> On 3/9/06, Chunwah Ho wrote:
> >
> >
> > — J Eric Murphy wrote:
> >
> > > Today a week into the drill and I stopped trying to
> > > make excuses and
> > > start making approaches. >snip< > > > Eric
> > >
> >
> > Congrats on making it through the first step. Realize
> > that you’re doing something that the majority of men
> > cannot do. Give yourself a pat on the back.
> Thanks for the encouragement Chun!
> Actually I am taking it from the 21 day drill, then the reporter drill
> after than then some ancoring drills after that.
> I have also owned the natural leader and expect good for quite some
> time, the originals and the new versions.
> This is bad that I have been lurking on this list since the begining
> and am now just starting.
> Eric
>
> > P.S. for optimal results read the 21 day drill in the
> > files section (created by Hypno Bill)
> >
> > Chun
>

Hi Eric,

No, it’s not bad– we all have different timing. Some people just jump
in and do it and others think about, leave it alone for a while and
then SOMETHING gets them to pick it up again. Now, does that mean
they’ll go through it this time? Some will.

Others will repeat the cycle several more times until they realize
that what they will get(future self: being able to approach
confidently, strike up a conversation with anyone and attract and
seduce the type of women you want) greatly outweighs the time and
effort invested in these drills. That’s really all there is to it.

To help you learn even more, do a short version of Lesson’s Learned
Drill– Ask yourself : What happened? What did I do? What will I do
BETTER next time? And then visualize or imagine it the way you want it
to go next time. This is best done right after your field work while
your memory is fresh.

Keep going and ask questions here. We’re here to help you.

Warmly,
George

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Message: 3
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 00:30:30 -0000
From: “kumadakochi”
Subject: Re: Body language

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “Hart, Simon”
wrote:
>
>
> >>The best advice is to pay attention to her, and not your own emotions,
> thoughts, and fears. But, and this is a key distinction, don’t
> over-analyze the meaning of the things she does (or says), because
> that is not really paying attention to her. It’s only paying attention
> to how you’re reacting to her, and that’s what your supposed to forget
> about to begin with.
>
> This is something I need to be constantly reminded of – pay
attention to HER
> and how she’s reacting, not to my own emotions and reactions because
they
> just throw me off.
>
> S
>

I might extend that even further to just take everything she does as
being interested. Always stay positive and in a positive mindset then
the set will go better.

-RJ

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Message: 4
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 00:36:38 -0000
From: “dddrsos”
Subject: Step by Step (day 5)

Today i practiced the smile in the mirror and do my missions a bit
easier.
I asked for directions with no problems to 8 girls and smiled to 5
girls but without show my teeths (a timidly smile).
I have no problem showing my teeths to people that i know, but today i
try to do it but i need more time. My evolution was not so bad, the
other day i didn’t smile to strangers, today i smiled timidly, maybe
tomorrow i will smile warmly 🙂
Small observation:
-With my timidly smile i recived some smiles back.
Question:
-If the girl look at me i need to make a smile in this moment or wait
a moment and smile?

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Message: 5
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 00:41:22 -0000
From: “kumadakochi”
Subject: Re: Constructing Routines

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, Chunwah Ho
wrote:
>
>
>
> — “Hart, Simon” wrote:
>
> >
> > I have been constructing my own routines, and all
> > I’ve been doing is
> > listening to myself when ever I tell or hear funny
> > stories from my own life.
> >
> >
> > If they get a good reaction, I remember them and
> > maybe beef them up a bit
> > and commit them to memory. I think this is better
> > than sitting there trying
> > to write them like a script writer.
> >
> > They are also more unusual and sound real. Like when
> > I get the chance I tell
> > a story about how I once pushed a giant snowball off
> > a bridge onto a
> > passenger train roof, causing a massive dent in it
> > and terrifying
> > passengers, and got arrested for willful damage.
> > This is in fact a true
> > story, but I would never have been able to sit there
> > a dream it up.
> >
> > S
> >
> >
>
> Thanks for the advice Simon, I came up with a couple
> that are not just stories but I wanted to give them
> something to chew on and promote some good
> conversations. I tried them out on a few
> approaches…it sucked LOL
>
> Chun
>
>
>>
I think you want to eventually make up your own routines. I personally
haven’t got there yet, I do tell some stories from my own life and
past relationships. For example, when someone asks me what I do, I’ve
worked out a story to tell people how I ended up where I am now (PhD
Chemistry student, huge conversation killer if you just drop that
bomb). I’ve heard it called grounding, you basically show the HB
you’re talking to that if she followed the same path, she could end up
the same place you did.

I’ve always had problems with openers so I do used mostly canned
openers unless I think of something unique to the environment or I get
a strong IOI from a girl. After you practice for a while, you’ll be
more congruent and add your own personal twists to your sets.
Remember, your an “artist”; part of it is about creativity.

-RJ

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Message: 6
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 05:21:17 -0000
From: “George” Subject: Re: Body language

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “kumadakochi”
wrote:
>
> — In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “Hart, Simon”
> wrote:
> >
> >
> > >>The best advice is to pay attention to her, and not your own
emotions,
> > thoughts, and fears. But, and this is a key distinction, don’t
> > over-analyze the meaning of the things she does (or says), because
> > that is not really paying attention to her. It’s only paying attention
> > to how you’re reacting to her, and that’s what your supposed to forget
> > about to begin with.
> >
> > This is something I need to be constantly reminded of – pay
> attention to HER
> > and how she’s reacting, not to my own emotions and reactions because
> they
> > just throw me off.
> >
> > S
> >
>
> I might extend that even further to just take everything she does as
> being interested. Always stay positive and in a positive mindset then
> the set will go better.
>
> -RJ
>

RJ,

I see the reasoning behind your point, but it PAYS to be fully aware
of her behavior and to ADJUST yours accordingly.

For example, if I follow your reasoning, I’d reward various behaviors
I don’t find useful and treat them the same as the ones I do find useful.

Example? Of course, here’s one: She is not getting emotionally
engaged– she doesn’t want to do that because she perhaps feels that
I’m a player(it has happened a number of times). Do I treat that as
though she were interested? My experience tells me “No”…I change
what I’m doing and help her realize that she can trust me.

That’s my understanding of your point, but if that’s not how you
intended it, I’d like an example, so we can learn something useful.

Simon, your point about paying attention to her and how she is
reacting is right on the target ,AND it also pays to be aware of your
own thoughts and feelings in the moment so they don’t sabotage your
interaction.

Warmly,
George

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Message: 7
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 05:31:19 -0000
From: “George”
Subject: Re: Step by Step (day 5)

— In seduction_dating@yahoogroups.com, “dddrsos” wrote:
>
> Today i practiced the smile in the mirror and do my missions a bit
> easier.
> I asked for directions with no problems to 8 girls and smiled to 5
> girls but without show my teeths (a timidly smile).
> I have no problem showing my teeths to people that i know, but today i
> try to do it but i need more time. My evolution was not so bad, the
> other day i didn’t smile to strangers, today i smiled timidly, maybe
> tomorrow i will smile warmly 🙂
> Small observation:
> -With my timidly smile i recived some smiles back.
> Question:
> -If the girl look at me i need to make a smile in this moment or wait
> a moment and smile?
>

Good job. See it’s getting easier and easier. yes, wait a second and
THEN smile…slowly.
—————————————————————

A little bit of topic, but still related to seduction…when I was
participating on Mindlist, one of the members (Win Wenger) shared a
simple technique for making almost anyone feel like you’ve known them
forerver….

Here’s the way I recall it:

1) Recall a really good friend and recall how you smile when you see
her. Keep that image in your mind…what’s it like? Really get into
it. Practice it a few times until you can recall it as though your
friend was in front of you.

2)When you meet someone, recall that image and the feelings that go
with it and let your smile FLOOD across your face. Mind you, this is a
slow flooding smile and not a Cheshire Cat Smile.

3) Notice their reaction. How did they respond to it. Their eyes?

Try it, you’ll like it.

Don’t use this technique with the drill– only when you’re meeting
someone.

Warmly,
George

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Message: 8
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 05:39:03 -0000
From: “George”
Subject: Time to revise and supercharge The Reporter Drill– Your input is
requested

Hey guys,

I’ve gotten a ton of feedback so far and I’m going to revise the
drill, so it’ll include most of the insights from Chun, Simon and the
others who have emailed me directly.

Here are some tips I’ll be including:

1) How to handle your self-talk.
2) How to handle your daily ups and downs.
3) Tape recorder vs Notepad.
4) Questions to ask
5) How to handle “turndowns”
6) Where to go and do the drill
7) How to keep learning more and more and get those “Aha” moments.
8) What to do if you think you’re not “ready” for it?
9) How to short circuit your fears while in the field?

Anything else I need to cover? Any and all opinions, suggestions and
questions are welcome. If you want to email me directly, please put
“Private” in the subject line.

Warmly,
George

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Message: 9
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 07:05:27 -0000
From: “miles0029”
Subject: Re: So I Finally Made Approaches

Great to hear you are approaching. anthough this is just the start,
realize that you have much to prove and accomplish. gain confidence
and you will excell.

Miles

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Message: 10
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 07:07:54 -0000
From: “miles0029”
Subject: the classic

I’ve number closed on this girl that has worked at the local bowling
alley. Shes a solid 7 to say the least, however, one of my friends who
has a gf and a girl on the side has been fooling around with my new
number close. Should I pursue, or abandon ship because she has already
been part of my friend’s arsenal.

Miles

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Message: 11
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 07:24:34 -0000
From: “googleisbetter80013”
Subject: fellows

okay, girl I work with, any thoughts? it’s a part time job, so I see
her a max of an hour a day.

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Message: 12
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 04:48:13 -0800 (PST)
From: Chunwah Ho
Subject: Re: Time to revise and supercharge The Reporter Drill– Your input is
requested

— George wrote:

> Hey guys,
>
> I’ve gotten a ton of feedback so far and I’m going
> to revise the
> drill, so it’ll include most of the insights from
> Chun, Simon and the
> others who have emailed me directly.
>
> Here are some tips I’ll be including:
>
> 1) How to handle your self-talk.
> 2) How to handle your daily ups and downs.
> 3) Tape recorder vs Notepad.
> 4) Questions to ask
> 5) How to handle “turndowns”
> 6) Where to go and do the drill
> 7) How to keep learning more and more and get those
> “Aha” moments.
> 8) What to do if you think you’re not “ready” for
> it?
> 9) How to short circuit your fears while in the
> field?
>
> Anything else I need to cover? Any and all opinions,
> suggestions and
> questions are welcome. If you want to email me
> directly, please put
> “Private” in the subject line.
>
>
> Warmly,
> George
>
Here’s one more, I would like to include “How to
handle Temptations”

When her gfs scream “she’s single, she’s single” and
she’s been flirting with you the whole time (while you
try to keep cool), then you end up with her # and
stare at it all night instead of reviewing the
approaches, you’ll realize the power of this baby.

Chun

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Message: 13
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 05:03:41 -0800 (PST)
From: Chunwah Ho
Subject: Re: Re: Constructing Routines

— kumadakochi wrote:

> I think you want to eventually make up your own
> routines. I personally
> haven’t got there yet, I do tell some stories from
> my own life and
> past relationships. For example, when someone asks
> me what I do, I’ve
> worked out a story to tell people how I ended up
> where I am now (PhD
> Chemistry student, huge conversation killer if you
> just drop that
> bomb). I’ve heard it called grounding, you basically
> show the HB
> you’re talking to that if she followed the same
> path, she could end up
> the same place you did.
>

Why is that a conversation killer if you study
Chemistry? Maybe you can relate it to seductive
chemistry…it’s all the same, some bonds form and
some bonds break 😉 Maybe you should prepare a routine
in case that question comes up again in the future.

> I’ve always had problems with openers so I do used
> mostly canned
> openers unless I think of something unique to the
> environment or I get
> a strong IOI from a girl. After you practice for a
> while, you’ll be
> more congruent and add your own personal twists to
> your sets.
> Remember, your an “artist”; part of it is about
> creativity.
>
> -RJ
>

Yeah, I tried a few of my own and it didn’t work so
well (actually it works better in some places than
others and also the age groups plays a factor). So I’m
going to stick with the canned ones for now and
gradually change to my own in the future. See what
happens. Thanks for the advice.

Chun

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Message: 14
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 02:21:03 -0800 (PST)
From: Eek / nitainev
Subject: Re: Time to revise and supercharge The Reporter Drill– Your input is
requested

— George wrote:

> Hey guys,
>
> I’ve gotten a ton of feedback so far and I’m going
> to revise the drill, so it’ll include most of the
> insights from Chun, Simon and the others who have
> emailed me directly.

[…]

> Anything else I need to cover? Any and all opinions,
> suggestions and questions are welcome. If you want
to
> email me directly, please put “Private” in the
> subject line.

Based on feedback I got when designing another drill
for approach anxiety, I’d add in a detailed
description of a couple of interviews, specifically
including the situation around it. How many people
were present, how were their body language compared to
the interviewee, what time of day was it, how did the
person feel going into the situation and as it
progressed. Etc. Anything to make people visualize a
success situation.

When I tried to help people using my drill, I
experienced that those that were anxious would take
anything that wasn’t 100% clear and specified and turn
it into the worst possible situation, feeding their
anxiety.

And when examples and constraints where missing,
they’d use perfect freedom to create as scary
situations as possible.

In a totally different direction, I’d tell people
about extreme stepdowns/”Sum of small wills” (credit
to Gunwitch for making me think of this in connection
with approach anxiety). Instead of trying to force
yourself to “do the approach”, force yourself to
smaller steps: “Move my left foot forward, move my
right foot forward, look her in the eye, say ‘Hi!’,
…”‘

-Eek

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Message: 15
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 16:07:28 -0000
From: “kumadakochi”
Subject: One of those nights

Has anyone ever had one of those nights where you just can’t make
discussion or talk to anyone? I did 5 approaches and two went ok, the
other three were just aweful. It was like throwing gasoline on a fire.
I could actually see the girls feeling sorry for me.

I feel like this happens about one out of every five nights out.

-RJ

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Message: 16
Date: Fri, 10 Mar 2006 15:27:13 -0000
From: “gattaca626”
Subject: wingman in buffalo, NY

dear frnds,
I was wondering if any of you guys reading this is living in
buffalo, NY. Iam put up an hampton inn in buffalo downtown, and I will
be here for a few more weeks, if any body wants to meetup and go
sarging, or for that matter try any techniques in the field, please get
in touch with me, Iam open to all kinda places, and have plenty of time
on the weekends.