CONFIDENCE TIP 5

Here is your next tip to build greater self-confidence.

Tip 5: Succeed with others.

Succeeding with others can be very difficult, especially if
you’re shy.

Here are six simple but very effective keys that will help
you to win with others.

But first, you need to understand a universal and powerful
law: the law of reciprocity.

The law simply states that when others do something for you,
you feel a strong need, even a push, to return that favor.
This law has been used as a persuasion technique since the
beginning of time. It is used in sales, marketing and any
relationships. This very mini-course is a way to use the law
of reciprocity.

So the law of reciprocity is about how to get anyone do a
favor for you. If you want a smile, give a smile and expect
one in return. If you want a friend, be a friend and expect
the other person the become your friend. If you want money,
give money. The giver always receives, that’s simply the
law.

The first key to winning with others is to be agreeable.
When you disagree, do it in a gently manner. Say something
like “OK, I’ve always thought that…”

The second key to winning with other is acceptance. Accepting
yourself is essential for personal growth and accepting
others is a key to effective relationship. Accepting others
is taking the other person like he or she is, without
suggesting that the other person needs to change appearance
or behavior.

The third key to winning with others is to appreciate.
Gratitude is one of the great qualities that seems to
disappear nowadays. Yet, we have a lot of things we could be
grateful for. Appreciation for another person is simply
saying thank you. This costs nothing but it can have a
tremendous positive impact in your relationship with others.
People will feel good about themselves and they will feel
good about being around you when you.

The fourth key to winning with others is to admire. Everybody
has one and often several qualities. Your job is to find
them and to think of these positive qualities when you deal
with them. As most of the people tend to focus on negative
qualities in the other person, that will
help you deal with people with more ease and you will
resolve problems much easier and faster.

The fifth key to winning with others is to praise. It is
about raising self-esteem in others. Say something like
“you’re important to me” “You are unique”, “Nice to see
you today” “Nice to hear from you.” “I believe in you”. This
will instantly change how the person feels about herself and
raise her self-esteem. And when you do this kind of favor,
to a person, you feel better about yourself too, your self-
esteem just went up.
Praise and approve everything that the other person does
that is worthwhile.

The sixth key to winning with others is to listen. Listening
is a core skill in any healthy relationship. The most
effective way to lose your friends is to talk, talk and
talk. An effective way to win sales, negotiation, a relation
etc is to listen, think and talk. When you listen to
someone, pause when they finished. It means for them that
you care about what they just said.
Listening builds trust and intimacy.

When you deal with others effectively, your self-esteem goes
up and you feel valuable and you really enjoy your own
company.