The Science Behind Instant Attraction

I read a 55-page research report from Standford University and the University of California, Santa Barbara so that you didn?t have to. You?re welcome.

Levity aside, the report is?actually full of really exciting and important stuff.

What researchers did was conduct 1,000, four-minute ?speed-dates? (all heterosexual as a control). Then they examined which ones went bad and which ones went good, based on whether a?person felt that they had an instant connection with the other person.

Seems straight forward enough, but what?s interesting is that these researchers have essentially cracked the code as to what creates instant attraction in women- what makes them want to see some guys again, and others not all.

Granted, some of these may or may not be as surprising, but at the very least it?s nice to know that science is around to confirm these?theories.

Women felt most connected to?a guy?when;

1. The man?was actively engaged in the conversation, with the conversation focused on the woman.

(She was talking mostly about herself.)

2. The man laughed often and when appropriately queued?by the woman

(Generally meaning that they both laughed at the same time).

3. Women?were interrupted by the man who asked questions or expressed interest in regards to what the woman was saying.

4. The man said positive and flattering things to say about them.

(Negging is out. Shameless compliments and teasing are in)

5. The man used the word, ?you? a lot.

6. Words like, ?kind of,? ?sort of,? and ?maybe? were not used.

(Actually this was true of both sexes. No surprise that uncertainty and lack of confidence seem?to be a hard turn off all around.)

Okay, so maybe all the 55-page study by a bunch of highly educated scientists did was say that you have to be confident, conversational, fun, funny and shameless complimenter, which is what we?ve all been writing about for years.

But at least it?s nice to know that science is on our side.