Day #12: How to “Tease” Girls

Today at the gym I witnessed a guy crash and burn bad talking to some chick.

He made a classic mistake A LOT of guys make who are just starting to learn to how to “flirt.”

The girl he was talking to had a fairly large tattoo on her wrist.

His convo was going ok.

Then he says: “You’re gonna regret that tattoo when you’re fifty.”

He probably watched an episode the The Pickup Artist a couple years ago.  Thought he was “negging” her.

He wasn’t.

That wasn’t a neg.

It wasn’t teasing.

It was just an asshole comment.

I know.

I used to make those sort of comments all the time.  ( still do from time to time, but now it’s mainly for my amusement 🙂

He got the same result that I used to.

The girl gave him a weird look.  Got a little defensive.

Then walked away.

…and that’s the difference between “teasing” and making an asshole comment.

Teasing makes an interaction more fun. More playful.  It’s flirting. And it takes the girl back  to the playground.

Asshole comments kill momentum. They make a woman feel uncomfortable.

Yesterday you were supposed to grab a copy of the Teasing and Banter Cheat Sheet.  Important that you read through this as it explains “The Theory of Expectations”.  If you haven’t read it yet, get it here: Get it Here.

How do you know the difference between teasing and making an asshole comment?

Here’s some examples:

Making a joke about the amount of time she must take to get ready (teasing).

Telling a girl you see “grey” in her hair (asshole).

Telling her that you can totally imagine her as school teacher cuz she’s got a “bossy” side (teasing).

Saying to a girl who is a school teacher “Is it true that those that can’t DO… teach…” (asshole).

It’s a fine line between teasing and being an asshole.

Make sure that what you’re teasing her about is NOT belittling her, or it does not come across as condescending.

How do you begin to tease her?

Listen to her. But listen carefully.

A woman will give you all of the ammunition you possibly need to quickly turn the conversation to a more playful level.

What are you listening for? You are on the lookout for anything that she says that you can twist.

Or things to misinterpret. Something that you can use to tease her with.

Some things to listen for:

  • A bossy side
  • Her blonde side
  • Double entendres (particular ones that can be taken as sexual)
  • Paranoid
  • Her wild side
  • Naiveness

Once you hear any of these you’re in.

You can twist and turn them into some kind of playful joke.

Say you’re talking to a girl. And she tells you a story about how she yelled at one of her co-workers for cutting in front of her at the copy machine.

You could say:

“Nice… a girl with a bossy side.  Are you one of those girls who throws a temper tantrum when she doesn’t get her way?”

(Stomp your feet on the ground in mock temper tantrum)

“That’s cool though. I like bossy girls. Just not in the bedroom.  You don’t have whips and chains hiding under your bed, do you?”

That’s teasing.

That’s being playful.

That’s bringing it back to the playground.

It’s funny…

Cause when you’re doing it right… The girl will say “you’re such an ASSHOLE.”

When you’re doing it wrong she’ll get quiet and likely walk away….

Make it Happen

Bobby Rio

P.S. Another thing to keep in mind is to always to try to tease a girl about how she’s acting…

…and avoid teasing her about how she looks or things she can’t change about herself.


P.P.S. Tomorrow you learn a super “easy” way to approach a girl and start a conversation.

Previous Lesson:  Day 11

{ 36 comments… read them below or add one }

John Hunter September 30, 2015 at 5:19 pm

I’m really digging your daily lessons and PDF Downloads Bobby. Thanks dude.

Mike August 2, 2015 at 4:50 pm

Hey Bobby,

I’m liking your e-mails and the information I’ve gotten from you. You have brought much understanding to me and I am sure others about how the whole guy-girl thing works. With that said, when are you going to get to the things you promise your are going to reveal? You mentioned you would let us know where the coolest places are to meet women but so far, no deal as an example. So what gives with this?

lawrence m December 1, 2014 at 7:38 am

Hi Bobby, please let me congratulate you on your great products. I also want to personally thank you for putting so much free info out there for me to learn from. The product I purchased has given me the reassurance that I have received good value for my dollar. I’ve just crossed that 50’s threshold and felt much advice out there I could not relate to, until yours. Again, my thanks.
Please allow me to pass on one observation I’ve gleaned from your work. I will preface these remarks by pointing out that I’m not perfect and by no means feel this is a reflection of you personally or the work you contribute. The reason I’m writing this note is to merely point out that originally I had a hard time folowing you, in general, because of an inordinate amount of spelling and grammatical errors in your writings. My guess is most are typos which are easily corrected. However some are total misuse of english words or even made up words (for example trying to make the point of layering your conversation and adding texture to a conversation you use the term “texturized”, which even if a word is out of place and consequently a simple “textured” would suffice.) which directly undermine your credibility in my humble opinion. Sir, please accept this for constructive criticism because it is an easy fix. Perhaps an internship to that geeky (and horny) english lit major who’d gladly proof-read your materials for free, among other possible solutions are feasible at this time for you? Its about reaching a wider audience and coming off as more professional to those you reach. This is about authority and living what you teach to take your game to the next level.
Again. no disrespect intended. I really want to see you take your game to its highest level in a business sense.
With regards;
Lawrernce MacDonald

Tomasito July 25, 2014 at 8:17 pm

hi Bobby,
Again, you cover an important subject. To me “Almost well done”, because I am missing something very important: And it’s about to really pay attention to “From where (culture) the girl is coming from?”. Especially for people like me (which travel a lot back-and-forward between different countries), I can tell you that “I learned the lesson“: It is a fine line between funny teasing and f*** asshole – and this line is not always at the same point….some think “how funny” – others put you already in what-ever-asshole-zone……As you mentioned (and I think this is absolute important) “Listen to her. But listen carefully.”->> long before you try to make any funny teasing!!! And start slow&small – this might will save your flirt (or, in worst case, even your life;)…Believe me, you are talking about a very fine line here, nothing for beginners

Nick June 4, 2014 at 8:51 pm

Thank you for this direct link! ^

Bobby Rio February 5, 2014 at 4:32 pm
tucker May 4, 2013 at 5:21 am

why cant i get this cheat sheet? its saying web page not found?!?!?!

sajid December 17, 2012 at 10:42 am


akshay November 6, 2012 at 4:00 am

not so intresting

jeff July 5, 2012 at 3:36 pm

21 here, been learning this stuff and “basement dwelling”. But with starting college in Fall, I’m trying some of the stuff out. I ran into a cute chick at work, put on my best game face, flirted, and friend requested her on facebook. My first rejection, and I could give a shit. So many girls, so little time.

peter May 3, 2012 at 8:44 pm

keep em coming, bobby

peter May 1, 2012 at 2:43 am

I believe I missed day 13 today

EG April 27, 2012 at 11:58 pm

Great thing I was going to do the same thing bt as i can read i was doomed to fail…

Devon W March 25, 2012 at 5:44 am

@ Bobby. I do not believe I have came across whether or not it would be ok to Mock and have some *fun* with mocking a girl, whether she’s too talkative. Especially when a girl goes like Um… Like… just to kick it off that you’re flirting right off the bat, and only do it for one or two sentences and move on. Would there be anything wrong with that?

Devon W March 25, 2012 at 5:40 am

@ Calvin: Actually that’s not an asshole comment, nor is the 2nd message you said. Not sure if it’s really teasing though. Saying that she looks uglier because she removed it is an asshole comment. Although a girl can take it the wrong way you you mentioned you looked sexy, like she doesn’t look sexy anymore. So expand a little bit more on that part.

PS: Then you could probably follow up and say… well benign tumors could potentially become cancerous, and it would be worth keeping you around even though you …. (then add something quirky)

calvin March 8, 2012 at 9:58 am

hey bobby, so there is a girl in my class, and i noticed she had a mole on her face, really sexy! But somehow after winter she remove it. i want to tease her about that, so i made a comment on her photo,says it’s too bad u remove it. she reply “yea, i remove it already,what? u feel sad? And i started to think what should i said next, i typed “yea! u look sexy when u had this mole. is this an asshole comment or teasing? i still don’t quit get this yet.

gib February 5, 2012 at 2:29 pm

Ok biobby

kcino January 18, 2012 at 9:30 am

Hey,bobby I flirted with the receptionist where I pay my rent
She said what’s up ,I said all that brown you wearing now I got to buy Some chocolate ,then I saw this book ,I said what is this book all The girl’s on the bus talking about it was book #3,I said the girl said she started reading#3 first,the receptionist said ,she is so
Backwards,I tell you about some people.
I went to the bank and flirted with the teller,I said how are you coping with the winter ,she said don’t like it,I say you still complaining ,you left and came back ,right then blonde and naive
Girl showed up,she didn’t remember telling me about it ,so she
Said what are you referring too,I paused and dropped it,the computer started messing up,and paranoid girl showed up,I waited for my receipt,and she kept saying,she was sorry,which told me two things,she has a twin or her recall is bad,it don’t matter ,when
She stood up and walked over to the Machine behind her she has a nice round ass .

Carlos January 8, 2012 at 4:58 am

(Grows to some huge giant, gets all red) (Stomps with every word) WERE, IS, MY, FUCKING, CHOCOLATE ( slaps the shit out of him)

Learning December 11, 2011 at 3:12 am

@cougar One of the other things Bobby was mentioning was the fact that women have no idea what they want and often try to say/tell what they want. This is useless because they don’t know what that is. What they say and their actions are two completely different things. She can say “Oh I’m so into you” but if she’s not down to hang when you hit her up or keeps blowing you off then probably you’re not doing something right. Girls who are into you want to hang out/talk/be around you because you’re such a blast! (Reality Factor) So with all that being said, here’s how Bobby’s little “asshole” test works: if you are doing it wrong and acting like an asshole/dick then she will be so repulsed that she will stop talking to you/lose interest. Now if you are being cocky/funny and she’s still texting you back/going out with you and is playfully saying you’re such an asshole then you’ve got it right.

cougar December 8, 2011 at 5:08 pm

hey bobby, i dont get the meaning of your sentence ” cause when you’re doing right… the girl will think you are such an asshole ”.
why will she think we are asshole if we’re doing it right?
thank you

john December 6, 2011 at 12:01 pm

hi bobby, am using your skills we this 1 girl, but the thing is. she is 6 years older than me, and she told me she proper likes me, but always uses the age gap between us, any ideas ?

simz November 20, 2011 at 12:00 am

bob this is just great…… aha !!!!!! i know where my mistake lies….. i learn something new here..

sk- solomon Island

raymond dudley November 11, 2011 at 1:47 pm

dear mr bobby. can you give me day 9of your lesson please ?thanks raymond 11/11/11

Ed November 10, 2011 at 12:28 am

Hey man
A problem I always have is that if Ive been getting to know a girl over a period of time I start off flirting fine but after a week or so I kind of lose momentum and cant get it started again so she starts to lose interesst again. Any tips??
Cheers Ed

ryan November 8, 2011 at 8:42 am

thank you alot.its a great stuff.

Brendan October 25, 2011 at 6:10 am

I’m a divorced car saleman and since reading your stuff I have been on a date and sold more cars in a week than I have in a month. I think its because Im not taking life so seriously anymore. Teasing girls and flirting with them (and my customers) is so much fun. I love it when I get the response Im looking for.

Demeterious October 22, 2011 at 10:39 am

Finny i ain’t Bobby but I think that is an asshole comment. Couse teacher said this and she proabky wanted some complement from you but instead u debased her when u said I think?

finny October 18, 2011 at 3:38 pm

hey bobby a girl was talking to me about how her teacher said that he would have given her a prize if he had for her neat work but then i gave her a comment not to expect a noble prize for it .what do you think about this statement

PakiUSA September 26, 2011 at 1:03 pm

Hey Bobby great talk but i also want to know about the blonde side, paranoid and the rest cause u just explained the bossy one.

brad September 14, 2011 at 9:26 am

great clip, awesome summary with that girl. It is so true. So good and true that I subscribed to her youtube channel.

She seems to encompass a lot of David D, and the principle of teasing and cocky/funny.

John September 13, 2011 at 6:07 pm

Thank you so much for the great advice, my game is slowly changing for the better

Blake August 20, 2011 at 5:43 pm

This is a girl who’s giving us men great advice which is truthful and NOT misleading.

How To Really Attract Women

Adam Chamberlain August 10, 2011 at 9:31 pm

I used to say asshole things, because it was the opposite of being a wuss. However, that still came off as insecure and mean. So I adapted into The Smartass. And women love it 🙂

Jason G June 17, 2011 at 7:13 pm

Man, I make asshole comments all the time when I’m trying to flirt. Definitely something I need to be more aware of.

Bobby Rio May 27, 2011 at 5:00 pm

Some of you have written me saying you don’t have Facebook and wanted a copy of the Cheat Sheet. So here is a link you grab the cheat sheet from without having to connect with TSB

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